The Next Star Trek Series (Post Dis) Will Be So Dark That...
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Captain Lorca would be quite comfortable? 
It'll be so dark that...
- the entire crew is killed every episode (making it technically an anthology series).
- one of the crew is a serial killer in his spare time, but it's okay, because people accept his choices in the future.
- money no longer exists. Instead, people barter with slaves and organs.
- billions of people die in an episode, and the Captain ends the adventure on a bad joke. Oh, that already happened.
- the entire crew is killed every episode (making it technically an anthology series).
- one of the crew is a serial killer in his spare time, but it's okay, because people accept his choices in the future.
- money no longer exists. Instead, people barter with slaves and organs.
- billions of people die in an episode, and the Captain ends the adventure on a bad joke. Oh, that already happened.
...not even JJ's lens flares will be able to illuminate the inky blackness that will consume Trek.
...we find out the captain killed his entire last crew before being assigned to the hero ship.
Oh wait.
Oh wait.
... that people will attempt to escape to the mirror universe en masse.
....it will be directed by the people who made "Hobo With A Shotgun."
VIEWER 1: Dude, I totally love this new Star Trek series. It's so dark. The characters are so gritty. It's deep and complex and adult. Blows every other previous Trek series out the water...
VIEWER 2: (squinting) All I see is a black screen...
VIEWER 1: Yeah, man, isn't it the greatest?
VIEWER 2: (squinting) All I see is a black screen...
VIEWER 1: Yeah, man, isn't it the greatest?
If it sells...
It will be so dark that it'll ruin Gene's Vision™, that's for gosh-heckin-hell sure.
If the writing is good and it's done right... 
...That it will be filmed inside the event horizon of a Black Hole (maybe Oprah's!)
Racism/sexism are also a good way to earn Warnings around here. I'm not going to hand out a separate Warning for this post, but you'll get one the next time you post something like this.
...DAH, COMMISAR (Don't turn around!)
You've already been given a friendly about disputing mod actions in-thread. Warning for Trolling. Please use your day off to reconsider either your posting habits or choice of online forum.
So dark it'll need lens flares.
It'll be so dark that...
- ...You'll be watching it at high noon and think it's midnight.
- ...Each series DVD will be pre-sharpened so you can slit your wrists with it.
- ...The Battlestar Galactica reboot will be appear cheerful and campy by comparison.
- ...You'll wish it was still 2017.
- ...Internet trolls will express heartfelt sympathy for the viewers and reevaluate their life choices.
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