TOS Caption Contest #183: Not On A First Name Basis

[Rat Boy]

Phew! Looks like we survived the TrekCore Screencap Crisis of 2010, so let's get on to another caption contest. First, let's comfort...

For probably inducing a few dozen groans and also for proving why one should update a caption contest on a regular basis, our winner is...

Sulu: Captain I believe the ship is Cuban.

Well, at least he didn't say Cubist. Anyway, for a demonstration of the Peter Principle, our winner is...

Mirror Sulu's henchmen knew they were boned when they realized...the "Security Chief" had brought a knife to a phaser fight.

For double checking just to make sure, our winner is...

SULU: Please. Just this once.

I want to know what it's like...so I can laugh about it all later in my diary.

And for Omega IV's version of Crossfire, our winner is...

CLOUD WILLIAM: I long think that Book of Holies is living document to be read in modern context, but Cloud Festus is strict constructionist.

And our Photoshop winner, which should be making you hungry right now...

Sulu: "Sir, I didn't expect to be bombarded with croutons."

Kirk (OS): "Don't play dumb, Mister Sulu. Two hours ago, I had the largest cheese wheel on the ship brought to your station, ordered you to make cheese fondue, and you haven't touched a thing."

Sulu (embarrassed): "Oh my."

Congratulations to the winners. This week, we pay homage to Uhura, so without further ado, let's keep the preamble short. The bonus pic was something Leonard Nimoy posted on his Twitter feed. This contest will run until next Wednesday. Get to it:

 

[Rat Boy]

Spock: "What's wrong with it?"

Uhura: "I don't know. I'm drawing a blank."

*ba dum dum*

Kirk: "Uhura...beautiful!"

Uhura: "But...I really wanted an android body."

Chapel: "Captain?! Mr. Spock?!"

Uhura: "I think we'll be beaming back now."

Shatner: "...so then, I said, 'What bicycle?'"

Nimoy: "Prick."

 

[LeadHead]

Spock: Send this Message. "Texting was outlawed in 2230. Please call us on Cell phone."

Uhura: Captain, can I stil have that android body?

Scotty: Yes Sir, can we still have that android body?

Uhura: Waiiit a minute.

Uhura: Can we tap dance right next to Kirk's head too?

Shatners BBQ was powered by Laughing Gas.

 

[cooleddie74]

UHURA: I don't understand sir.

The bulb was brand new...it shouldn't have blown out THIS quickly!

KIRK: Uhura...BEAUTIFUL!!!

UHURA: Thank you, sir...think I can be in the ship's performance of WEST SIDE STORY next month?

KIRK: Let's not get crazy, now.

CHAPEL: Stand perfectly still, Uhura.

The Kirk's vision is attracted to MOVEMENT. And short skirts.

SHATNER: Craft services has really taken a nosedive since Gene started spending part of our budget on Beatles and Stones records...

 

[cooleddie74]

SCOTTY: Can ye let GO of the lass, sir?

FIRST let's escape from here...THEN ye can try to cop a feel and score with the senior officers!

 

[A beaker full of death]

Uhura: I can't believe that's supposed to be me.
Spock: So... wanna recreate the transporter room scene?

 

[Nerys Myk]

KIRK: So, Uhura. You ever heard of the phrase "pulling a train"?

 

[Nerys Myk]

UHURA: Looks like the Captain forgot to pay the cable bill again

BARRETT: Gene could you at least keep your pants on for a minute when Nichelle and I enter your office.

SHATNER: Rumor is the budget's slashed and we're canceled. Thats why we have to fix our own food BBQ style.

NIMOY: Good one, Bill.

( all laugh)

 

[ItsGreen]

It said felicitations Lieutenant, not titillation.

 

[ItsGreen]

Chapel, Better or worse with the new body?
Uhura, Better or worse?

 

[T'Girl]

Kirk: "I see a unicorn."
Sulu: "I see a castle."
Chekov: "I see a field of flowers."
Scotty: "I see a dancer."
Uhura: "I see a princess."
Spock: "I see a piece of manila construction paper."

Kirk: "What's gotten into you Uhura?"
Uhura: "hee hee hee hee."
Kirk: "Where's Mr. Spock?"
Uhura: "hee hee, in the lift."
McCoy: "Oh for gods sakes Spock, get your pants up."

Nimoy: "What do we have to go with these beans?"
Kelley: "I got some Bourbon."
Shatner: "Bourbon and beans?"
Nimoy: "A explosive combination."
everyone laughs
Shatner: "Someone should put that into a show."
Kelley: "Take a pretty lame director to put that into a show."

.

 

[Gary7]

Spock: "Uhura... Uhura? Lt. Uhura, don't try to pretend you're so focused in your work that you don't hear me."
Uhura: "Oh man, I think I'm way overdue for a break. That cloudy manifestation out there is talking to me!"

Kirk: "Scotty, you're a genius! This life size mannequin replica of Uhura is perfect. Just the right size, anatomically correct and everything, with no guilty after effects. Hehehehee."

Chapel: "Oh... my... God..."
Uhura: "I don't believe it. Do you see what I'm seeing, Nurse Chapel? What is Captain Kirk doing to that... that replica of me?!"

Shatner: "Do you hear 'em carrying on? Calling out to us, but we're nowhere to be found. And we're right here behind the set with a makeshift BBQ, chugging beer. To hell with the last season!"

 

[LeadHead]

Shatner: Dang! You got Chocolate on the green wrap around! They won't pay to have it cleaned!

Nimoy: Oh don't be so dramatic, I'm sure they won't just not use that one anymore.

 

[Nerys Myk]

Kirk: "I see a unicorn."
Sulu: "I see a castle."
Chekov: "I see a field of flowers."
Scotty: "I see a dancer."
Uhura: "I see a princess."
Spock: "I see a piece of manila construction paper."

Uhura: "I see a panda bear."

 

[Gary7]

Kirk: "Spock, let me get this straight--you went into the past to get this futuristic no-mess grill?"

 

[Jonas Grumby]

Uhura (thinking): "Ew! Cooties!"

Shatner: "...so I got this little script girl I knew from 'The Defenders' to call Roddenberry up on the phone, claim she was Hunter's wife, and then read Gene the riot act about how her Jeffrey was too good for his cheap little TV show because her Jeffrey was a real movie star..."

 

[Tribble]

Spock: What are they saying?

Uhura: They keep repeating the same words over and over again.

Spock: What words?

Uhura: "What do you want?"

 

[LeadHead]

Spock: What are they saying?

Uhura: They keep repeating the same words over and over again.

Spock: What words?

Uhura: "What do you want?"

Spock: This part of space is so wierd. That one alien yesterday wouldn't stop asking "Who are you?"

 

[Rat Boy]

Uhura: "A spider!"

Spock: "I'll get some tissue and flush it down the toilet."

Scotty: "Where's my hug?"

Chapel: "It's true! If you do shake it more than twice, then you're playing with yourself."

Uhura: "I'm frightened."

Kirk: "The hell you two doing in the mens room?"

 

[Gary7]

Spock: "'The Young and the Restless'. What primitive society is broadcasting such useless information?"
Uhura: "Mr. Spock, will you quit dissing my soaps??"