First of all as a person who is well versed ins 20th century history (history is my major) some of the confusing quotes you mentioned are real life things said by real people that the movie. Chang saying that Shakespeare is better in the original Klingon is a reference to Adolf Hitler who loved Shakespeare and claimed that Shakespeare was originally German. Spock's line about Nixon going to china was a joke about president Richard Nixon who despite being one of the most staunch opponents of communism actually traveled to china and the Soviet Union and made great strides in communication and helped mend tensions witch eventually helped lead to the end of the cold war. So Spock is making a joke that maybe Kirk can do the same with the Klingons.
I'm also aware of where these quotes came from, which is one of the reasons their inclusion took me out of the movie. They struck me as unnecessary jokes or comments where Meyer is giving everyone a "wink" to remind everyone how literate and clever he is. Oh well...
I do appreciate your other comments but still can't quite get past the mind-meld scene. Nimoy invented the Vulcan Neck Pinch because he didn't think Spock would hit someone with the butt of his phaser to disable them. This pacifistic attitude made Spock a different sort of character to many fans. Kirk punched, kicked, did whatever he could to subdue his opponent. Spock disabled them with a "pinch". This is why I just don't like Spock forcibly pulling Valeria towards him and taking her thoughts from her, something that seems to cause her quite a bit of discomfort.
Trust me, I understand it's for the good of the universe and that the needs of the many outweigh the needs of the few. I just find it so completely out of character and wished there was some other creative way to accomplish this. We agree to disagree but I truly do appreciate your comments.