HS wrestler wimps out, won't wrestle girl

[iguana_tonante]

By denying her a fair match, he only served to belittle her and imply that he regarded her as a lesser or weaker opponent.

No worse, an unworthy opponent. This reminds me of Iranian athletes refusing to compete with Israelis. If the tournament rules allow women to compete he should get over himself and do it, or stop wrestling completely.

This.

I've been practicing jujutsu for more than ten year (albeit non-competitively), and I regularly spar with both men and women. It would be the highest disrespect to treat women differently, and they would be highly insulted if I did that. They stepped on the mat willingly, and I am bound to treat them exactly the same as anyone else. The fact they are women is completely irrelevant.

The only "courtesy" I allow is that, beyond the usual no-strike zones (eyes, ears, genitalia), I will try not to hit women over the breast area, since it's a painful area for which I have no equivalent. Other than that, they'll get the same treatment as a man, for good or bad. I am "old-fashioned" as the next guy, but once you step on the tatami, we are all equal. For me, it's no coincidence that the term "jutsuka" has no gender. And in my experience, most women I practiced with liked it that way: they pay good money to practice martial arts, not to be patronized. Some guys tend to go easy on them just because of their sex, something they usually find very frustrating: different strength and ability levels have to be reasonably taken into account when practicing, but gender has nothing to do with it.

To each their own. You may not agree with his convictions, but in the end this young man did not back out from fear. Instead, he stayed true to his beliefs, in which he felt was honoring her. Her father was not offended, though we don't know what she personally felt. The boy lost a chance at the greatest honor in his sport to date, yet by doing so retains a sense of personal honor. That's rather refreshing in today's world of high school sports.

Bullshit. If his "honour" makes him disrespect other people, then his honour is nothing. I see he also cited his faith as a reason to default. Well, if his faith makes him treat women as inferior, then his faith is bullshit, too.

There are obvious physical differences between men and women, and I don't think it would be a good idea to have mixed-gender competitions for everything. But once you join a tournament that allows both genders to participate, you fight the opponent you are presented with, male of female. If you refuse, it makes you no better than someone who refuse to play against people of a different race.

I feel quite strongly about this, both as a practitioner of martial arts and as a supporter of equal rights. I would like to hear the opinion of some women about this, tho, since I've only seen guys commenting on it so far (me included...).

 

[Robert Maxwell]

I have yet to form an opinion about this as I can kind of see the points of both sides. Interesting discussion, though.

 

[Admiral Buzzkill]

Would it really be any different if the issue was race and not gender? I seem to remember this being a problem after Jackie Robinson made the major leagues (at least one team threatened to strike over that). Would it have been so principled for opposing teams to refuse to play against a team which had a black player?

You're right about this and the people defending this kid are wrong.

This was a sporting event open to boys and girls. The one thing he most certainly did not do was show respect for his opponent. By denying her a fair match, he only served to belittle her and imply that he regarded her as a lesser or weaker opponent.

This. Shame on him.

 

[Neroon]

Then I guess we'll have to agree to disagree. If a state as wrestling crazy as Iowa can allow genders to wrestle each other, then there is support for it. Then again, California has separate leagues which seems to say the opposite.

 

[Trekker4747]

This guy was a front runner in his weight class, but defaulted in his first tournament match...because his opponent was a girl.

Linky

Is this kid for real, or what? He's lucky his coach didn't kick his ass off the team.

I don't blame the guy. First of all wrestling a girl is just all kinds of messed-up and just goes against gentleman's code and any outcome wouldn't have been favorable to him. If he won then, he looks like a jackass for "beating up" a girl. If he lost then he'd be made-fun of until the end of his days for beating up a girl.

So, really, it was just a messed up situation for the guy and he bowed out. I cannot praise, nor fault, him for his decision.

 

[Mr. Laser Beam]

If he won then, he looks like a jackass for "beating up" a girl.

Uh, no, everyone knew that a guy and a girl would be wrestling each other. Girls can wrestle boys in this state, everyone knows it. Someone's got to win and someone's got to lose. 50/50 chance it's the girl. Nothing jackass-like about winning in that situation.

 

[Maestro]

He was afraid he'd touch her boobies. And like it.

 

[Chaos Descending]

http://sports.espn.go.com/ncaa/highschool/news/story?id=6135272&campaign=rss&source=ESPNHeadlines

Girl wrestler not bitter about default win

Cassy Herkelman would have rather wrestled Joel Northrup than to become by default the first girl to ever win a match in Iowa's state tournament. But the 14-year-old said Friday she didn't feel slighted when he refused to wrestle her because she was a girl.

"He had the right to make his own choice, and he made his choice," said Herkelman, one of two girls in this year's tournament. "It's not like he did what he didn't want to do."

"That's their belief, and I praise them for sticking to it. This is the biggest stage in wrestling in the state, I would say, and they stuck to their beliefs when it probably tested it the most," he said. "It was probably a tough pill for him to swallow."

Herkelman said it would be a "lot more fun and more exciting" if girls could wrestle other girls in Iowa instead of having to face boys. She had a 20-13 record at Cedar Falls High entering the tournament and thinks it would have been a close match between her and Northrup.

 

[iguana_tonante]

I don't blame the guy. First of all wrestling a girl is just all kinds of messed-up and just goes against gentleman's code

Is that anything like The Bro Code? "Bros before Hos"? Yeah, very gentlemanly.

I was under the impression a gentleman was to treat women with respect and politeness, not smugness and condescension. Would you treat a female engineer differently than a male one on the job? A female lawyer differently than a male one in court? No? Then why a female athlete is different? Now, if there is a clear imbalance in weight or strength, I see the need for different categories, just as boxing does not allow 100 lbs boys to compete with 250 lbs walking mountains. But apparently that was not the case, as both athletes were in the 112-pound weight class. Apparently, the only issue were her genitalia (which I think you are not supposed to grab during wrestling matches).

any outcome wouldn't have been favorable to him. If he won then, he looks like a jackass for "beating up" a girl. If he lost then he'd be made-fun of until the end of his days for beating up a girl.

That's true. And you know why? Because of people like you. So, good job on being the reason for continuing sexual discrimination.

Why is wresting a female wrestler "messed up"? She is there by her own choice, to compete in sport. Is it "messed up" to beat a girl in soccer? Tennis? Ping-pong? Poker? Chess? When it becomes ok to treat women as equal opponents in competitions? Or it's the all the touching that makes it "messed up"? Are men incapable of seeing women except as sexual objects? Men "can't help themselves"?

Because, you know, in any way I see it, that is messed up.

 

[Neroon]

The boy was in a classic no-win situation. Whether it's appropriate or not for boys to wrestle girls is not the question here. My point is this boy should not be criticized or ridiculed for taking the stance he did, a stance which comes at great personal cost. Neither his opponent nor her father have a problem with this, nor do they take him to task for it. They respected his reasons and moved on.

 

[Mr. Laser Beam]

The boy was in a classic no-win situation.

In what way? If he goes ahead and wrestles the girl, that's a win, since that's what he was SUPPOSED to do. Everyone knew that. Even if he lost the match, at least he tried. And if he won? Well, that's also expected. Everyone knew the opponent was a girl, so obviously no one would have blamed him for going ahead with the match, whether or not he won it.

 

[Maestro]

Win-win. Touch the boobies and move on.

 

[AJBryant]

^ Some call it conviction, I call it chickening out.

Someone once said something to the effect that, "when someone acts out of conscience, all others should shut up."

 

[Amaris]

That's a tough one. I can see both sides of the argument, and I can understand why the young man would be conflicted [it is heavily ingrained in most men that one must not hit a woman, even in self defense]. That said, if it were me, I would have wrestled her. When it comes to competitive sports, anyone who steps into the ring, onto the basketball court, baseball diamond, what have you, is my equal. I will do my best to win.

 

[AJBryant]

I would have played tennis, baseball, volleyball, etc.

Wrestling?

No.

There's groping and grabbing and rolling around and all sorts of things that I prefer to do only with my sweetie pie. Not that I have a sweetie pie at the moment, but if I did...

 

[Sector 7]

Someone once said something to the effect that, "when someone acts out of conscience, all others should shut up."

This is a wise proverb.

The problem with all the scenarios put forth by those who disagree with the young man's decision... is that they are flawed. This boy has been taught a set of values by his family. Every parent who has taught their kids NOT to give in to outside pressure from peers, adults, etc. should understand his perspective.

As males, we are taught to never raise a hand to a female, even if they hit us. Now that this young man has done as he was taught, people condemn him. This is the true no-win scenario.

I applaud the young man for staying true to his convictions, even when it could have cost him what he wanted most. Especially in an age when many youth are giving in to the temptation to use drugs, smoke, have sex too early, steal, commit violent acts and more, because people want them to betray the positive values they were taught.

 

[Mr. Laser Beam]

Someone once said something to the effect that, "when someone acts out of conscience, all others should shut up."

Conscience is not an excuse for everything. What if a radical anti-abortion protester shoots and kills a doctor who performs abortions? They would undoubtedly tell you they're following THEIR conscience. Yet that doesn't make it right...

As males, we are taught to never raise a hand to a female, even if they hit us. Now that this young man has done as he was taught, people condemn him. This is the true no-win scenario.

Uh, no. This is sports. It's WRESTLING. Physical contact is normal here. It's expected. Indeed, it's REQUIRED.

It's not abusive or violent, it's normal, healthy competition. And in this state, women participate alongside men. That's the end of it.

While it may have been this kid's right to default, it would also have been his coach's right to kick him off the team. Kid's damn lucky that didn't happen.

 

[archeryguy1701]

^........... Please tell me you did not just compare a kid who doesn't want to wrestle a girl because he feels it's inappropriate to someone who shoots another person.

So he didn't want to wrestle a girl because of his personal beliefs. What's the big bloody deal? I say good for him for doing what he felt was right. Just because you would have wrestled her doesn't mean he was wrong to not do it.

 

[Mr. Laser Beam]

^........... Please tell me you did not just compare a kid who doesn't want to wrestle a girl because he feels it's inappropriate to someone who shoots another person.

Not as such, no. Like I said, though, 'conscience' is not an automatic excuse for everything. That's all I intended with that.

 

[sonak]

I read this story and found it bizarre in the extreme.


basketball, baseball, etc. which are mostly non-contact sports are gender-segregated.


Yet of all sports, WRESTLING, a highly physical-contact-oriented sport, is open for men and women to play together-for HIGH-SCHOOL students, no less.


Is this a joke? I would almost assume that one of the motivations for making it so would be the titillation factor.


This would make me VERY uncomfortable if I were a wrestler, and the kids should not be put in this position.


I think the male wrestler showed a lot of integrity with his decision, and the people who allow this male-female wrestling crap should get their heads out of their butts.