Any Xena:WP fans on the boards?

JanewayRulz! · Feb 24, 2011

Episode 97 season 5 # 7 "Back in the Bottle"

The interesting thing about this ep was how "Lao Ma's power seemed to have a mind of its own", revealing things to Xena/ calling her back to the fight etc. It seemed like Xena couldn't control the power, but the teaser is really just "foreshadowing" for what happens in the climax.

Best line?

Gabrielle: "Xena, I'm starving. Can't we just cook this thing and eat it?"
Xena: "Shh, Gabrielle-- I'm trying to achieve absolute stillness."
Gabrielle [Clears throat as Xena tries to cook the unskinned, not gutted rabbit that Gabby is holding. Thankfully, instead of cooking it its turned to stone]: "Great-- another one."
Xena: "I don't know what's going on. Ever since that fight with Pao Su, I can't seem to harness the power."
Gabrielle: "I'll say."
Xena: "What did Lao Ma have that I don't?"
Gabrielle: "A full stomach."

Pao su's ghost has teamed up with her half brother and they have a new warlord and his army to conquer Ch'in. The "secret" of the black powder is revealed not only to this warloard, but to everyone of the 100,000 men in his army, assuring its continued use even if the warlord is killed.

Xena hooks up with Kao again, and Gabrielle meets some Chinese resistance fighter that acts like a jerk the first time they meet. There's supposed to be chemistry between them, but neither me nor Renee can see it.

The point that irks me about their relationship, however, is Joxer's take on it.

Lin: "You know, we heard Xena travelled with a companion-- a storyteller of sorts."
Gabrielle: "I am. I-I mean, I used to tell stories, but it's been a while."
Lin: "When you're born with the, a-- gift of the bard, you die with it."
Gabrielle: "My life's more complicated now."
Lin: "I think you're selling yourself short."
Gabrielle: "You don't know me."
Lin: "I know that someone who's willing to die for a cause greater than herself has a merciful heart-- and that's where all great stories come from."
Joxer: "Hi. Hi, hi, hi. Am I interrupting? I'm not interrupting anything-- am I?"
Gabrielle: "No."
Joxer: "Good."
Gabrielle: "What are you doing here?"
Joxer: "Xena wants ya."

Now, maybe its just me, but if anyone should be worried about someone trying to get close to Gabrielle, it should be Xena since the only promise to be "there" that Gabrielle has made to anyone was to Eli ABOUT Xena. Joxer, my friend, Gabby's foot in your pants last "week" does not a promise make.

Of course, even though she's the only one who "should" be worried, as we've seen from "Chakram" (when Joxer tries to get Gabby advice from Xena) , Xena doesn't worry about "that".

There's more of an attempt to create some X/G interaction this "week"... Xena senses Gabrielle's danger and uses Lao Ma's power to save her etc, so its "better" than last "week" but still seems wanting.

Lin's goodbye to Gabrielle was "funny" since they never really connected, his assumption that there might be a future for them was as surreal as Joxer's assumption.

Gabrielle: "Are you going home?"
Lin: "You and Xena have it right-- to, uh-- stand in one place in the world this big is a real waste of space."
Gabrielle: "Um-- "
Lin: "So, um-- you're the story-teller. How's this gonna end?"
Gabrielle: "I haven't-- written it yet." (leans forward to kiss him dantily on the cheek before she leaves)
Lin: "Goodbye, Gabrielle."

I wasn't sure what Xena was talking about, when she took her leave of Kao. re: "the terrible choice" kao had to make.

I realize there was controversy in Xena killing a 100000 soldiers at one blow, and I blame the writers for the magnitude. IIRC there were only a few thousand terra cotta soldiers discovered in the tombs of the chinese kings. Since TPTB wanted Xena responsible for their creation, the warlord's army only needed 2-3000 men, each carrying the knowledge of the black powder. Still, 2-3000 is quite a "massacre" and yet what Xena was trying to do was save Ch'in by killing all knowledge of the black powder. Since it wasn't officially invented until the 9th century, one could say her "massacre" succeeded.

Anyway.. the two eps in Ch'in did not advance our series the way season 3's did. More's the pity.

From Whoosh.org

06-11-00. In the June 2000 issue of Chakram, the newsletter of the Official Xena Fan Club, Robert Tapert was interviewed:

Interviewer: Do you have a more personal investment in Xena because this was a character you always wanted to do - a character you helped invent?
Robert Tapert: Yes. I love the bloody show! And no one is more disappointed that this season, for example, the two China episodes, which I felt should have been great, were disasters. They were done during a time of transition of the staff of the show and we tried to shore up the second one, but it didn't work. A pregnant Xena facing the decision that the only way she could protect herself is to kill 100,000 people is a great emotional moment. And nothing was made of it. That was the whole story. Xena saying, "Gabrielle, I can't kill all these people and bring somebody into this world and not have it affect my child." That was the story and it got lost and changed into things that didn't matter.
Interviewer: I was stunned when there wasn't any discussion about turning the army into stone. I realize it was based on that story about the archeologists finding the buried stone army, but that's something Evil Xena would have done. Not the Xena of today.
Tapert: I think if those two episodes had been better, it would have changed a lot. They were just two letdowns. "Back in the Bottle" was one of the weakest shows we've ever done. It's what Lucy and Renee have said. Even when you're fighting, you need to find the heart of the scene that protects the love between the characters. And that didn't happen this season. We had that in the third and fourth seasons.
Interviewer: Xena would never kill 100,000 people without blinking.
Tapert: Right.

Tappert also said, "There was no passion [between Gabrielle and Lin Qi]. Renee came to me and said, 'This is not going to work.' I told her to do her best and I'd try to rescue it in the editing room. But the story between Gabrielle and Lin was such a bad idea. It needed to be about Xena and Gabrielle and the weight on their shoulders."

11-21-99. According to ET, Lucy Lawless was 6 months pregnant when she filmed PURITY and BACK IN THE BOTTLE.

10-05-99. SUCCESSION is a Steve Sears script. He originally wrote DEM BONES and BACK IN THE BOTTLE as well, but they underwent such extensive re-writes by Orci and Kurtzman that they bear a small resemblance to the originals and they will might possibly be credited to a pseudonym.

09-15-99. Apparently Steven Sears mentioned that this was the hardest episode that he had ever written in terms of walking the line with subtext actually becoming maintext. This was the last script that Steven Sears worked on for XWP. Apparently it has been undergoing extensive rewrites. Also, it is looking like that this episode might be the China episode, the binge episode, the mermaid episode, or -- eek -- something totally different.

Me Again.

I don't get this subtext/maintext comment at all, regarding this ep. :confused:

If anyone cares to explain it to me, please do!

saturn5 · Feb 25, 2011

Purity is ok but after the epic feeling of Xena's first meeting with Lao Ma it doesn't have the same quality. 'Back in the Bottle' is just TERRIBLE TERRIBLE TERRIBLE! You wonder how they ever blew what must have been vast chunks of the special effects budget on it (or did they just have loads of footage from another ep they needed the use up?)

JanewayRulz! · Feb 25, 2011

saturn5 said:
Purity is ok but after the epic feeling of Xena's first meeting with Lao Ma it doesn't have the same quality. 'Back in the Bottle' is just TERRIBLE TERRIBLE TERRIBLE! You wonder how they ever blew what must have been vast chunks of the special effects budget on it (or did they just have loads of footage from another ep they needed the use up?)

Tapert: It's what Lucy and Renee have said. Even when you're fighting, you need to find the heart of the scene that protects the love between the characters. And that didn't happen this season.

I think its "the special effects" and the "exotic locale" that got in the way of simple story telling. I rewatched the first part of "BITB" last night, and the plot holes were so huge that they were incomprehensible. I'm not talking the usual "how does Xena take down 20 men" or How does someone who doesn't know what she looks like or where she hangs out, finds her "so easily" in Ancient Greece type of holes.

I mean simple internal logic like why is Xena saying the refugees are coming from "Lao Ma's temple"... when she doesn't have a temple. The place Kao & Xena trained in the previous ep (Lao Ma's former home) was "empty", so its not like it was being used to venerate the former leader.

A few lines later its called Lao Ma's Palace, and Gabrielle rides ahead to check it out before Joxer & Xena turn the refugees to go BACK there.

But???? If they are leaving it, why go back?

Then AT the palace, Gabby runs into young chinese resistance fighter and "too cool for school" man about town. She wants him to stop doing what he's doing (Heck, I don't know what he's doing, so why does she want him to stop)

G: "You have to abandon your work here."
Lin: "This palace is directly in the path of Khan's army. Me and my men can hide out here for two, maybe three, days."
G: "You will be killed in the process."
Lin: "It'll give the people a chance to escape."
G: "They can't clear the pass in time. Their only hope is to hide in the tunnels under this palace. Xena-- "

BUT BUT BUT..... Gabby I thought you said he and his men would be killed if they stay here.. in the palace in the path of Khan's army? If that's so, WHY do you want the refugees to hide here, in the path of Khan's army where they could be KILLED?????? :cardie:

The director on the dvd complained that every time they got a rewrite, it was from a DIFFERENT writer, so I suspect there WAS no internal logic to follow since no one person understood the story.

:scream:

Oh well... to err is human.

To really screw it up takes a committee!

JanewayRulz! · Feb 25, 2011

Episode 98 Season 5 #8 "Little Problems"

Tapert: It's what Lucy and Renee have said. Even when you're fighting, you need to find the heart of the scene that protects the love between the characters. And that didn't happen this season.

Not to disagree with the executive producer, but this "little" ep, actually showcases what Lucy and Renee are saying about "finding the heart of the scene that protects the love..." And the fact that Renee does it throughout this ep with very little dialogue just goes to show how a) easy it is to do or b) how good Renee is as an actress, to convey that feeling.

What am I talking about?

Just to get everyone up to speed first, Aphrodite has turned one of her temples over to some healing nuns to run a hospice. Our girls find out one of the patients is a little girl who's in a catatonic state ever since her mother died. "She's lost the will to live." says Aphrodite with as much compasion as an immortal can muster.

Xena, mother in waiting, leans over Daphne's bed and makes the grand gesture/statement ... "I'd trade places with ya if I could" kiddo which Aphrodite takes seriously. "Abracadabra" and whoosh... Xena collapses :eek:

next to the bed as Daphne wakes up. Aphrodite thought she just gave Daphne some of Xena's life force, but what she did was transport her entire psyche into the child's body. The two psyche's share residence, and although 1 can be dominant at one time, they both are listening and speaking to each other throughout the ep.

Fav line after the switch?

Aphrodite: "I can switch Daphne's life force with Xena's. Who knows? Maybe it'll give her the strength she needs to get better."
Gabrielle: "What about her baby?"
Aphrodite: "Oh, it'll be fine. It just stays in Xena's body and gets plenty of rest."

(I suspect LUCY's baby was all for THAT idea! :lol:

)

Daphne's father arrives soon after the "simple body switch goes awry", and Xena "in" Daphne assures Gabby she'll be ok with Daphne and her Dad while Aphrodite tries to figure out how to switch her back.

If one just listens to the ep, and doesn't watch it, you can easily miss the "heart" of X/G that I was talking about.

Watch when Gabby is hovering over Xena's comatose body right after the switch and again after Daphne has left with her "Dad". She may be busting on Aphrodite but all the while she's holding Xena's hand. Remember, "Xena has left the building", and yet Gabby is intent on providing comfort in some fashion as she spars with Aphrodite. :luvlove:

Aphrodite: "Boy, talk about failure (Daphne & her Dad) to communicate."
Gabrielle: (Kneeling in front of Xena, holding the unresponsive hand) "Says the god who can't pull off a simple body switch?"
Aphrodite: "Oh, relax! I'll figure it out! I just need to think."
Gabrielle: (Whispers to Xena) "That's what I'm afraid of."

The way Gabrielle "hovers" over Xena, literally like a mother hen, is quite endearing even while she's trying to help the Goddess find a way to correct the miscast spell. After coming up with a plan, she and Aphrodite eventually bring Xena to a cave to hide her while they go in search of a potion to restore her. Gabrielle continues to focus on the comfort of the soul-less body, trying to wrap her in her covers to protect her while they are gone.

But "the cold" isn't the only thing they have to worry about. Xena & Gabrielle sent a warlord's gang running from Aphrodite's temple in the teaser, and the warlord is an old "friend" who wants Xena at any cost. The gang have followed the girls and are now ready to relieve them of their "dead weight" burden. :klingon:

The fight that follows, reminds us all of WHAT an AMAZING woman Gabrielle has turned into, during her 5 years with Xena... not to mention how much Xena means to her. :adore:

Thugs' Voices: (As they run out of the cave) "But she whipped us good!" "Wait for me!"
Gabrielle: (Drops the burning rope she used to whip the thugs, and runs back to comatose Xena as she quietly says) "I wish you could have seen that one."
Aphrodite: (Reappears as Gabrielle's biggest fangirl!) "Whoo! Hoo! You go, cowgirl! Yippee-ke-yi-yay!"
Gabrielle: [Sarcastically] "Thank you for your help, again."
Aphrodite: "Oh, well, these are new nails."
Gabrielle: "You think you can stay around long enough to go to the
Gemini Club?" (Where they hope to steal a "oil" from one of Zeus' twins... "Castor" )
Aphrodite: "Does Medusa have bad hair days? I am so there!"
Gabrielle: "Aphrodite, I know I said no magic, but can you seal this cave? I don't want Tharon's men coming back for Xena."
Aphrodite: "Uh-huh so, now that you need it, it's OK to use my powers. Aren't you afraid I'm gonna screw it up."
Gabrielle: (Smiles as she turns on her own charm) "I'm willing to take that risk."
Aph: "All right. Let's go. I'm gonna seal this place up as tight as a drum."
Gabrielle: [Whispers again to Xena before she leaves] "I'll be back for you."

Well, what happens next is just another example of WHY TPTB like to put Gabby and Aphrodite together in a Xena lite ep.

"What happened to me": http://video.yahoo.com/watch/3426780/9564662

They are just TOO good. :guffaw:

"Chemical X" :
They crash the Gemini club as fake Norwegian siamese twins who end up oil wrestling with Zeus' siamese twin sons. I can't even begin to list the jokes that let fly, and DEFINATELY will not try to explain the "sight" jokes which occur as Aphrodite enjoys the wrestling a little "too" much.

Now, to be fair, while the girls are off fighting the gang, berating the club's bouncer, wrestling with the twins... Xena hasn't "just" been lying around all day.

'Since you've been gone"
She's been the big sister/foster mother to a troubled young girl who's just learned her Mother is dead and who doesn't know how to speak with her father. "Mom to be" Xena turns on all the charms as she sweet talks Daphne into learning to accept her new lot in life, and when necessary turns on the superhero when she takes over Daphne's body to save a runaway horse, not to mention when she opens up a can of "whup ass" on the warlords minions who come looking for trouble. (Think Autolycus in "The Quest"... and you'll get the idea. Daphne channels Xena... she just never has to/gets to kiss Gabrielle while doing it.

)

The "twins" get back to Daphne's home, just to learn her dad has been taken hostage and they want Xena in exchange. After "Xena in Daphne's body" finally defeats the warlord while Gabby and Daphne's father defeat his minions, we see that Aphrodite HAS come through when OUR Xena with Daphne at her side walk proudly into the castle as the last minion falls at Gabby's feet.

I have to admit, of all the people (Autolycus, Gabrielle, Callisto, Joxer, and Daphne) who have channeled Xena, Daphne is runner up to the queen herself, Callisto! :hugegrin:

The end was sweet, as Father and Daphne watch Gabrielle and Xena walk away into the sunset, along the beach (a'la the end of "Ten Little Warlords")

Gabrielle: "It's good to have you back."
Xena: "It's good to be back."
Gabrielle: "What are you doing?"
Xena: (Adjusting her belly as she walks) "Just checking that everything's where I left it."
Gabrielle: "Xena, I took good care of you."
Xena: "I know. Thank you."
Gabrielle: "What was it like, being young again?" (Xena gives Gabby a "neck" pinch for that particular crack!) "Ow!"
Xena: "You know, some people think that it's easy being a kid, but in a lot of ways, it's harder than being an adult."
Gabrielle: "You should remember that when your child's a teenager."
Xena: "Ooh, don't say the `T' word, Gabrielle."

:beer:

Aphrodite, the shipper:

JanewayRulz! · Feb 26, 2011

Although it really is episode 99 season 5 # 9... "Seeds of Faith"

It was celebrated as episode 100 by the publicity hounds. Tapert admits as much in the dvd interviews, and although whoosh.org tries to explain the discrepancy, alas I am too dense to understand it. :rolleyes:

Seeds of faith: Behind the scenes: (Can't find 1 or 2)

Part 3/4:
Part 4/4:

ANYWAY....

There's a great interview at whoosh.org under this episode... (tons of spoilers within, in case that matters at this late date.

)

06-17-00. In the June 2000 issue of Chakram (#11), the newsletter of the Official Xena Fan Club, writers George Strayton and Tom O'Neill were interviewed:

Part One
Interviewer: What were you handed to work with for this episode in terms of these are the things we want to tell. I know this was the episode where we would find out the father of Xena's baby.
George Strayton: We were told first there had to be a revelation that Callisto would be reencarnated as Xena's child. That was the main thing. Secondly, because of Lucy's pregnancy and cutting back her schedule, she could only be in half the episode. Those were the two main objectives.
Interviewer: Were you told to use Eli?
George Strayton: No, we pitched the idea of Eli's death and they liked it. We actually came up with several versions of the story and what you see is the one they liked.
Interviewer: Who is Eli for you?
George Strayton: In our minds, he's a combination of Gandhi and Jesus. That's not to say he should be taken that way by anyone watching the show. It's just that when we were writing the character, those are the people we were trying to think like. We read a book on Gandhi and non-violence for background material. And we coupled that with the spirituality of Jesus. Obviously there were some elements of the script taken from Bible stories. We wanted to explore them as well as The Last Temptation of Christ. These are things we found interesting to work with.
Interviewer: Many people viewed Eli as a prophet.
George Strayton: We didn't want to follow Jesus specifically. We didn't want people to have preconceptions. What we were trying to do is explore some of the things about Jesus most people might have been. We also wanted to make him human which is why we wrote the "Garden of Gesthemane" scene. We called it that when we were writing it. Where he's contemplating what's about to happen and he's afraid. We wanted to show that human emotion.
Part Two
Interviewer: The Dagger of Helios as a weapon that can kill a god.
George Strayton: Yes, THEY made a mistake. It didn't look like the Dagger of Helios to me (laughing).
Interviewer: True, but why use the Dagger of Helios?
George Strayton: We try not to come up with too many magical weapons that can do away with gods. So I thought that dagger from "Quest" would be cool. And the fans would have a reference. It's something Xena would have known about. But when I saw the dailies, I thought, oops- Interviewer: You wondered why they didn't just go to the prop department and get the Dagger of Helios that had been used previously.
George Strayton: Yeah. It must be down there somewhere.
Interviewer: Some fan made an astute remark equating the Dagger to a Swiss army knife - pull out one blade and it opens up the Ambrosia compartment. Another blade kills gods
George Strayton: We had actually worked out a whole storyline for the Dagger that didn't make it into the final script. Our back story was that Xena took it because she knew what it could do. She wasn't going to reveal it to anyone. She's the one who said it had to be hidden and gave it to one of the gods to hide. She didn't want to know where it was either. But she knew it existed and she knew she couldn't find it. She figured Callisto could.
Interviewer: Xena has not had a great time with gods and she's suspicious of them. Why would she believe in Eli?
George Strayton: She doesn't believe in Eli as a god and she doesn't think people should be lead like lambs to the slaughter. She thinks people should have the right to defend themselves. Eli is preaching non-violence and Ares is on the way. Xena's attitude is people should have the right to do what they want as long as they don't harm other people.
Part Three
Interviewer: Did I tell you I did an internet search for Twilight of the Gods?
George Strayton: I made it up! I just typed it one day and thought, "That sounds cool!" [Uh-huh, him and Richard Wagner and the entire Scandanavian culture]
Interviewer: That explains why I couldn't find it. [Obviously didn't look in the right places].
George Strayton: In our story, Xena wasn't out to kill all the Greek gods. She was just angry at Ares. For killing Eli and for what he did to Gabrielle. A bunch of scenes with Ares had to be cut. There was one where Gabrielle goes to Ares and asks him to train her. Ares thinks this is great! But Gabrielle says, "No, we're not friends. I don't want any relationship with you in any way. I just want you to teach me what you taught Xena."
Interviewer: When did this take place?
George Strayton: Just before Gabrielle goes to Eli's urn. Ares was in the town rounding up all of Eli's followers to kill them. Gabrielle shows up and says she wants to learn from him. So he starts training her. He's fighting her and telling her how to think like somebody who wants to win a war. "You have to hate everyone. Everyone's your enemy." That's why, when Gabrielle comes into town later, Ares says he doesn't have time for another lesson. Interviewer: Why did she seek him out and want to learn his ways?
George Strayton: Because she felt powerless after Eli's death and Xena accusing her of not defending him. She's heard the same thing from Ares and Xena. That might is right. One of her greatest friends died right in front of her when she was trying to do the right thing. She did what Eli asked of her, but it feels wrong. She doesn't immediately go to Ares. He seeks her out becuase he feels her confusion.
Interviewer: That's the scene where she's throwing the sais at the tree?
George Strayton: Yes.
Interviewer: Was she really going to join Ares?
George Strayton: She never thought of joining him, ever. Xena was a warrior once and Ares has similar abilities, techniques that Gabrielle would like to get a piece of. In Gabrielle's mind, Xena and Ares both have the power to save people. Not power to subjugate people like Ares does. She's going to him to try to get what she thinks she can use to make the world better. never is she thinking of joining Ares as an ally. Although Ares would love to see it that way. She's gone to Ares to get power to use for good. Part Four
Interviewer: When Gabrielle and Ares first began to fight, I thought, that's going to be tough to believe. But it worked and I think most of the credit goes to Renee.
George Strayton: I think that scene would have played better if you'd seen Ares teaching Gabrielle how to fight, but Renee was amazing. By the time we got to that scene, Gabrielle's got half her mind like Xena snd half like Eli. And she's willing to fight Ares because she's fighting for good.
Interviewer: Obviously, neither Xena nor Gabrielle can outfight a god. [Heh heh]
George Strayton: And Gabrielle gets her ass kicked! She's about to have her head chopped off when Xena arrives. At the moment when Gabrielle has fought her heart out, she can't win, we all knew she couldn't win, but she fought Ares anyway. That was cool. That was Gabrielle. She regained control inside herself at that moment.

12-14-00. In the June 2000 issue of Chakram (#11), the newsletter of the Official Xena Fan Club, writers George Strayton and Tom O'Neill said, "We thought ['So Ares is right? The whole future is shaped by warriors?'] was the crux of the episode in terms of the idea we were trying to explore... We weren't making a definite statement on what was right or wrong; just posing the question. I think it was Bob [Orci] who came up with that specific wording that embodied that thought in one sentence. That was our favorite part of the episode, too."

Lucy & Renee: Seeds of faith Commentary part 1: (Can't find part 2)

Hudson's dvd interview:
I'll be back later with my recap. :bolian:

JanewayRulz! · Feb 27, 2011

episode 99 (Faux 100) season 5 # 9... "Seeds of Faith"

What an interesting ep.

The teaser is set apparently in a Moroccan tavern. People are disagreeing about whether they should follow the Olympian Gods or a new teacher. Things get heated when suddenly a chakram goes careening through the tavern, clipping spears and stopping quarrels... until Gabrielle sees someone behind Xena reach into his "jacket" for what she assumed was a weapon. ALERT! Suddenly those sais are flying and a brawl breakes out which takes Pregnant Xena more than a few moments to quell. Once everyone stops fighting, Xena grabs the original man Gabby thought was pulling a weapon, and discovers only a hankerchief in his coat. Here comes the requisite 60 sec of comedy before the bottom drops out from under us.

Xena: "Gabrielle! What's the matter? He gonna hit you with his hankie?"
Gabrielle: "I-I thought that he had a weapon."
Xena: "What's going on here?"
Man: "Just a disagreement. 'Thanks' for stoppin' it before it got out of hand."
Xena: "It did get out of hand."
Ares: (Winks in from ???) "Just when things were startin' to get fun, you have to go spoil my good time."
Xena: "Ares at a village squabble? You must be bored."
Ares: (Looking the pregnant Xena up AND down) "You, on the other hand, have been keeping yourself busy. I wish I'd known you were lookin' for a father."
Xena: (Looks disgusted) "I'm not."
Ares: "Oh? Well, somebody clearly got the job."
Xena: (Snears as only Xena can) "Yeah, Gabrielle."
Ares: (Looks wistfully at Gabrielle) "I would have paid to see that." (Gabby just smiles)

We discover that Ares is worried that this new religion could imperil the Olympian Gods a time Xena calls "The Twilight". The Angel Callisto watches unobserved from the mezzanine, as Ares threatens not only Xena but her unborn child if she interfers with his persecution of the new religion.

TEASER ENDS

Act 1 begins where Xena and Gabby left off in the teaser, with Xena wondering why Gabrielle has become quicker to pull her weapons than to use her words to get them out of a "situation".

Xena: (Watching as Gabrielle is practicing with the sais while they walk) "Why are you doing that?"
Gabrielle: (Continues to flick the sais ) "Nine out of ten times the first strike means victory."
Xena: "We're not at war, Gabrielle."
Gabrielle: (Which one is supposed to be affected by the pregnancy hormones???) "Don't patronize me."
Xena: "It's just you've been so quick to pull those things lately, when words have always been your strongest weapon."
Gabrielle: "Do you have a point?"
Xena: (Xena, the PEACEmaker?) "Yes, couldn't we have settled that argument back there without busting heads, huh?"
Gabrielle: "Xena, I made a bad call. There was a time I used to pull you off anyone who looked at you sideways."
Xena: "I guess I'm starting to think like a mother, huh?"
Gabrielle: "Yeah, but I'm not your child. I can handle situations like that."

Gabrielle the tag along, then bard, then Amazon Princess, then sidekick, then Amazon Queen, then peaceloving disciple of Eli, then AVENGING SCOURGE of a Roman prison, then Evil Demon, then ARCHANGEL, then fierce protector of an innocent Xena, then equal partner.

Xena didn't need to ask "what has gotten into" Gabrielle. She's had a ring side seat for the transformation, and what Xena didn't realize was that she was telling Ares the truth in that tavern. Gabrielle may not have "fathered" her child, but she has seriously accepted the role of Xena and babe's official protector. Which means she won't wait for Xena's "okay" before she acts when she thinks she sees a threat.

They grow up so fast, don't they Xena?

Well, in case you haven't figured out who this new teacher is, that is leading people away from the Olympian Gods, wonder no longer.

Eli's Voice: "We don't need a sacred dagger! Love is the only weapon we need!"
Man's Voice: "Yes!"
Woman's Voice: "This is true!"
Eli: "It's a weapon the gods neither have nor understand and so they can't defend themselves against it! True love cannot exist without the risk of loss. The gods are immortal, my friends. What can an immortal possibly know about loss?"
A Man's Voice: "That's right, Eli."
Eli: "We don't need to fear them, anymore. It's their turn to fear us!"

Gabrielle and Eli reconnect as Xena goes on a recon mission to discover where Ares' troops are, and from which direction they will attack the village. ELI may think love is the only weapon you need, but XENA respectfully disagrees. Its one thing if he wants to die for his cause, but she protests when he looks like he'll take his followers with him.

Despite all the bravada she spouted at Xena, Gabrielle admits to Eli what troubles her.

Eli: "You've been quiet all afternoon. What's wrong?"
Gabrielle: "I feel like I've disappointed you. You're walking through life preaching peace, and Xena and I have swords in our hands."
Eli: "What, you feel like you've made the wrong choice?"
Gabrielle: "Yeah, I mean no. My heart says that you're right that everything you say makes sense. But then my head tells me that sometimes the only answer is to fight."
Eli: "Sometimes I feel the same way."
Gabrielle: "But you seem so sure of yourself like you have no doubt about your cause."
Eli: "Everyone lives with doubt, Gabrielle. This is the path
I've chosen. I just hope I have the strength to see it through. At least you've got Xena to buoy you in these times of doubt." (I guess he hasn't heard about the spats they've been having lately)

This is when Ares shows up to warn Eli away. Ares discovers, much to his chagrin, that Eli doesn't warn easily.

Meanwhile... back scouting in the desert, Xena meets up with Angel Callisto for the first time. Callisto is trying to warn her not to interfer with Eli's destiny. (Poor choice of words, Callisto, if you want to sway Xena.)

Oh... there was another 10 seconds of comedy in the middle of the ep. Our pregnant Warrior Princess has been spotted by 4 soldiers who are charging her with swords drawn, and our "Mother to be" asks the eternal question...

Xena: "Am I gettin' too old for this? ..... Na-a-a-h." [Fight]

As Xena fights, Eli is back at the village praying. A really sweet, quiet scene occurs next.

Callisto's Voice: (Quietly) "I've been sent in answer to your prayers."
(Eli opens his eyes to see a familiar face, the angel who sent him to revive Xena and Gabrielle in "Fallen Angel")
Callisto: "The kingdom of Heaven is beautiful, Eli."
Eli: "The kingdom of Earth is beautiful too, Angel. My place
has always been among the people."
Callisto: "And it always will be."
Eli: "Are you sure this is how it has to be? Isn't there some other way?"
Callisto: "The new world can only be built on the foundation of the old one. The order of the gods must fall. And you, Eli are the hammer. There is no reason to be afraid. Your faith is stronger than any who have come before you."
Eli: "Until now."
Callisto: "You said it yourself. `All fear is the fear of loss and
only through that fear can we truly love.' You wouldn't have been chosen if you weren't afraid. Remember, in everything you do we are always with you." (And scene ends with Callisto kissing the side of Eli's face as he cries)

He's accepted his fate in life, which irks Xena to no end. He won't lead his people to safety, so our Warrior Princess decides to act like Horatio at the bridge (She'd HATE the Roman metaphor, so DON'T tell her!) and keep Ares' army from crossing the chasm and entering the town. She's left behind the one person she trusts to protect Eli as well as herself.

Ares: "Now I'm gonna give you one last chance."
Gabrielle: "Eli-- "
Eli: "It's all right. No, Ares, I'm gonna give you one last
chance." (Gabrielle blocks a blow from Ares) "No, Gabrielle! If you save my life with violence, the future will pay the price."
Gabrielle: "Eli!"
Eli: "Now, I understand my calling, now. Please it's for the
greater good. Believe me."
Ares: "Enough talk." (Strikes again at Eli, and is AGAIN deflected by Gabrielle's sais)
Eli: "Gabrielle, please! I've never asked anything of you. So, I'm asking you now, have faith in me." (Gabrielle looks up into that earnest face, and turns her back to him, unable to watch what comes next. Eli turns to face Ares who's raised his sword over the crowd as he begins his oration)
Ares: "Since the beginning of time it's been warriors who have shaped the world!"
Eli: (Smiles confidently) "That's about to change."
Ares: "I don't usually take matters into my own hands, but in your case, I'm gonna make an exception." (And he kills Eli with a single thrust of his sword)

To view this content we will need your consent to set third party cookies.
For more detailed information, see our cookies page.

(To be continued)

JanewayRulz! · Feb 27, 2011

Episode 99 (Faux 100) Season 5 # 9 "Seeds of Faith" continued

"Last time, on Xena: Warrior Princess.. Ares, God of War, killed Eli, Prophet of Peace while Gabrielle stood by. Act ends with Gabrielle cradeling the dying man who once brought her back from the dead."

Holy Geezzzz!

Xena comes running in, to find Gabrielle a tearful mess, bending over the body of her spiritual mentor and the crowd stirring against her.

In his interviews, Rob Tapert talks about all the great stuff everyone gets to do in this ep... EXCEPT Xena. They used a plot device to lure her away from the action, but never gave her anything to do that was "important".

Mr T... I respectfully disagree. Xena did something "quite" important in this next scene... its just not what we are used to from her.

Xena: (Kneels before Gabrielle, Eli is across her lap) "What happened?"
Gabrielle: "Ares, uh-- I-- I don't know."
Woman: "She let Ares kill him! She betrayed us all! She should be punished!"
Man's Voice: "That's right!"
A Woman's Voice: "Yes!"
Xena: (Shouts the crowd down!) "Is that what Eli would have you do?! Huh?! Try to find a scapegoat when you should be banding together?!" (Looks tenderly at the dead prophet) Oh, Eli."
Gabrielle: (Whispers) "I believed him."
Xena: (Asks, innocently) "You defended him, didn't you?" (She doesn't like the look Gabby gives her in response) You defended him, didn't you?"
Gabrielle: (Anger rising) "Don't you blame me."
Xena: (Disbelieving the beloved face she's confronting) "You put up a fight, didn't you?"
Gabrielle: "Don't you dare blame me! Don't you dare blame me!"
Xena: [Whispers, begging for a different answer] "You didn't put up a fight?"
Gabrielle: (Stands up) "Xena, you were gone! I did what he asked me to do!"
Xena: (Stands up aghast, unable to deny the truth any longer, Gabrielle FAILED her!) "What about what I asked you to do?! The only reason that people like Eli exist is because people like us..." (Gabrielle is walking away from Xena in disgust.) "...defend them when they won't defend themselves!"
Gabrielle: (Turns back towards Xena one last time before running away from her "friend", and shouts.) "So Ares is right?! The whole future is shaped by warriors!"

The "Last Temptation of Gabrielle" scene is quite interesting, and I wish we could have seen the scene discussed in that whoosh article.. the one where Gabrielle takes a "lesson" from Ares.

The funeral of Eli was affecting, especially as Gabrielle walks away alone, without Xena. Her "heart to heart" to Eli's urn was also affecting, even though the writers really didn't make it clear whether Gabby was joining Ares or not.

What was clear, however, was the "woman" who joined Xena at the end of the funeral.

Callisto: (Quietly) "This isn't an ending. It's a beginning. Eli will continue the cycle of life as a soul that's reincarnated into a new body."
Xena: "I liked him just fine in the old one! And what about Gabrielle? " (Oh my, so Xena DOES see her friend's pain) She's suffering because she's caught up in the middle of your game."
Callisto: "I'm afraid Ares will cause her the real harm."
Xena: "That's why I'm going after him."
Callisto: "I realize you may never believe this but I care about Gabrielle and about you."
Xena: "Well if that's true you can take me to the dagger of Helios. They say that no person on Earth knows where it is, which is why I'm betting you do."
Callisto: "I don't know if I can do that."
Xena: "Well, why not? Doesn't your God believe in free will?"

(I understand from the interview why the authors picked a dagger we heard about in season 2's "The Quest", I just disagree with it vehemently!)

The two former adversaries go off to retrieve the dagger, and have even more heart to hearts.

Callisto: "Eli chose his path now you choose yours. I've remained in this realm simply to help you along. So, if it's the dagger you want it's what you'll get." (The dagger is revealed)
Xena: "The dagger of Helios. The power to kill a god."
Callisto: "Consider this, by killing Ares, are you honoring Eli's memory?"
Xena: "Eli's dead. Now, we do things my way."
Callisto: "Listen, please listen. I've spent my time in Heaven trying to reconcile the monster I was with the being that I am now. And I've come to realize we are all born of two natures, Xena good and evil. The side we choose to nurture defines who we are."
Xena: "Last person I need a morality lesson from is you."
Callisto: "If you won't listen to me, then listen to Eli. He sacrificed himself to make it easier for people to follow the way of peace."
Xena: "Like sheep to the slaughter. It's easy to preach peace when you live in Heaven. Where I come from, you've gotta fight for what you believe in." (She turns to leave, then stops and looks back at Callisto) "Why don't you come along? It's not everyday you get to witness the twilight of the gods. It should be a good show."

OH YEAH!

Ares is inciting the crowd.. but instead of shouting for him they are shouting against him. He threatens to start killing, when a righteous Gabrielle shows up, doubtful no longer.

Ares: (To the crowd in the square) "I'm glad to see your faith is strong because you're gonna die with it."
Gabrielle: (And the hero arrives!) "Not if I can help it."
Ares: "Uh, gee, Gabrielle I'm kind of in the middle of sum'in' here. We'll continue our lesson later."
Gabrielle: "It's actually a lesson for you, something I learned from Xena a long time ago."
Ares: "Oh, please enthrall me with your insight."
Gabrielle: "Peace is worth fighting for!"
Ares: "Oh, really."
[Fight]
Ares: (The two are caught in a clinch, sword against sais) "Why the return to form? I thought you'd given up on Xena."
Gabrielle: (My heroine!) "It would take more than you to dothat."

The fight continues, but Gabby IS up against a God, and finally ends up weaponless, on her knees, looking up into his eyes as he readies the killing blow...

CUE SPINNING CHAKRAM CUTTING ARES" BLOODY SWORD IN HALF!!!!!

CUE WARRIOR PRINCESS MUSIC AND WAR CRY AS XENA VAULTS INTO THE SQUARE!!!!

Xena is now toe to toe with Ares, and Gabrielle has jumped to her feet and has come to stand behind our Warrior Princess.

Ares: "I warned you about gettin' in my way again."
Xena: "You took the words right out of my mouth. Make a move on me please."
Ares: (Laughing) "A dagger? You're gonna have to do better than that."
Xena: (Sweetly) "The dagger of Helios. So, no I don't."
Ares: (Shocked) "How'd you get it?"
Xena: "Let's just say I have friends in high places."
Ares: (Snears) "Even if you kill me, you've already lost. Eli's dead!"
Xena: "Then it's only fair that you pay for his life with yours."

(But before she can kill the God of War... Xena sees Eli's face in the blade she's holding, and suddenly hears the first words he was saying, as she entered the village yesterday. She hears those words... and more.)

Eli: "We don't need a sacred dagger! Love is the only weapon we need!"
Gabrielle: (Shouts) "So, Ares is right?! The whole future is shaped by warriors!"
Callisto: "If you won't listen to me, then listen to Eli. He sacrificed himself to make it easier for people to follow the way of peace."
Gabrielle: (Whispers) "I believed him."

She hears... and finally, Xena believes.

Xena: "When you killed Eli, you made sure that his cause would never die. It's what he wanted, Ares. You played right into his hands. Now, you're hopin' that I'll play into yours."
Ares: "Sounds to me like the rationale of a coward."
Xena: "I'm gonna do worse than kill you. I'm gonna spare your life." (Throws the dagger to the ground and turns away from Ares)
Ares: (Grabs up the dagger and puts it to Xena's throat) "And what makes you think I'm gonna spare yours?"
Xena: (Laughs!) "You martyr me to Eli's cause, Ares, and you make it twice as strong. It's the beginning of the end. Enjoy your reign while it lasts. The twilight's upon you."

Ares is pissed, but he isn't stupid. He throws the dagger into a stone wall, breaking it before he takes his leave of both women.

Liked his last exchange with Gabby.

Ares: "And you... I could 'a given you the world."
Gabrielle: "You can't give me what you don't have." (He vanishes as Xena turns back to Gabrielle and Gabby whispers contritely to her Warrior Princess) "I'm sorry."
Xena: (Bless me Gabrielle, for I too have sinned) "Gabrielle I shouldn't have blamed you for Eli's death. I'm-- "
Gabrielle: "Xena, I was blaming myself. I'm sorry."
Xena: "No, I'm sorry." (The two hug, as everyone looks on. And I mean... EVERYONE)

Eli: (Who knows love when he sees it) "Your enduring faith in one another is the greatest miracle of all."
Gabrielle: (Turns to see a glowing prophet appear before her) "Eli?"
Eli: "Thank you, Xena, for keeping my cause alive."
Xena: (To Gabrielle) "I had help."
Eli: "Thank you, Gabrielle for listening to your heart. Like I said, you can never disappoint me."

(Floating next to Eli, is another familiar face we've come to know and love. One who has come to say goodbye.)

Callisto: "Xena, my time has come to be reincarnated into the mortal world and the body that will bear my spirit has been ordained. I can think of no greater mother than you."
Xena: (Catching on, finally, to this spirit that has stalked her) "It was you all along? You gave me this child."
Callisto: "In the past, I destroyed your life, Xena."
Xena: "And I destroyed yours. Maybe it's time that we both gave back what we once took from each other." (And the Angel Callisto's life force is absorbed into Xena's body as Eli and Gabrielle look on.)
Eli: (To Xena and Gabrielle before he too leaves) "Love is the way."

I remember what I felt when I saw this the first time.

Holy freaking Gawd!

ETA: Somebody finally posted the full "Behind the scenes" commentary.

saturn5 · Feb 27, 2011

Little Problems is a fun ep, a real case of wish fufilment on the part of a little girl getting to be Xena for a day but the Gabby and Aphrodite double act is fantastic. A bit much though that Gabby bemonas the shameless exploitation of women in a show with so much female flesh on display and some quite breathtaking kinkiness;

Favourite line;
Gabby (noting the container of magic oil on the twin's waist) "It's hanging below his belt"
Aphrodite (looking at something else altogether)" I've noticed!" :lol:

Seeds of Faith is obviously a gamechanger in the ongoing Xena storyline. It's heartbreaking that Xena at first fears Gabby is getting a little too badass then bemoans the fact she couldn't save Eli (against a god! even demigoddess Xena can only hold her own against her father so what was mortal Gabby supposed to do?). The Xena/Gabby/Ares scenes are powerful in the extreme and it's so unusual to see Xena and Callisto interaction without any animosity. We also have confirmation of reincarnation in the Xenaverse rather than just descendents
And now Cally will be reborn as Xena's child, well there's a twist we didn't see coming!

JanewayRulz! · Feb 27, 2011

Favourite line;
Gabby (noting the container of magic oil on the twin's waist) "It's hanging below his belt"
Aphrodite (looking at something else altogether)" I've noticed!"

Another fav A/G interaction... when the gang corners A&G in the cave...

Gabrielle: "If you goons think you're taking her anywhere, then you're dumber than you look."
Aphrodite: "Hmm! No news there. I mean, how smart is it to take a soulless body, anyway?"
Gabrielle: "Smarter than babbling about it."
Man's Voice: "`Soulless?' What does that mean?"
Gabrielle: [Snickers] "Gods, they're, they're so mysterious."
Aphrodite: (Ticked off) "Oh, yeah?! Well, figure this one out!" (And she disappears, leaving Gabby alone with the gang)
Gabrielle: "Testy, too." (Renee has such a great delivery on that line!)

What a karmic circle in Xena and Callisto's lives. Xena's army sets in motion the death of Callisto's Mother and Father. Callisto kills Xena's son in retaliation. When in Hell, Xena tried to make up for that crime by giving her purity to Callisto and taking on Callisto's guilt. But that lasted "barely a day"... not much penance for a double murder and the creation of a copycat killer/warlord. But now.. now she can truly answer "an eye for an eye" justice. She took away the love of a mother, and now she will give it back.

Talk about wishfulfillment.

In "Seeds of Faith" Xena becomes for Callisto, what Daphne from "Little Problems" probably wished for but couldn't articulate at the time.

What's even more amazing than Callisto being Xena's child... is that even though this is the last we see of "our" Callisto... her arc isn't even close to being finished on this show!

JanewayRulz! · Feb 27, 2011

Episode 100 (faux 101) season 5 #10 "Lyre lyre, Hearts on Fire"

I got to be truthful... I didn't like this "all that much" the first time through. I blame it on the "Bitter Suite" effect. i.e. I was so blown away by that one, nothing else measured up.

I'm happy to say, that I have since learned the error of my ways and have come to like this ep QUITE a lot.

Lyre lyre Interviews (Lucy, Renee, Ted):
TEASER: Draco and his men (remember him from the pilot and season 2's finale?) have found Terpsichore's lyre, but its in Amazon territory and they object to his ownership. Xena arrives in time to change the bloody battle to a Battle of the Bands"!

WAR!
Act 1: So Xena and her posse arrive in Melodius, the music capital of Greece to have the contest to determine ownership of the Lyre. And like all musicals from the 1940's to 1950's, we have the requisite "get everyone on board" number.

(This has a truncated "WAR!" but also...) the only version of "Getting ready" that I could find. (It also has Jace's first song... "Dancing in the moonlight")

The thing I like the MOST about this song (getting ready) , is who's introduced soon AFTER it finishes.

Cyrene: "Xena!"
Xena: "Mom! Ah-h-h!" (Cyrene runs up to hug her wayward daughter)
Cyrene: (Approvingly looks the pregnant woman up and down) "So, it's true! And when were you going to tell me?"
Xena: (Smiles unconvincingly) "Amphipolis was my very next stop."
Cyrene: "Well, you look positively radiant. When are we gonna meet your special someone?"
Xena: (Uh oh) "If you mean the father, the answer's never. He's not in my life." (THAT's an understatement!)

I have to admit, I LOVE Xena's Mom.. and this ep proves it to me yet again!

Throughout the ep, Cyrene is finding and sending men to Xena as potential Husbands/Fathers to her daughter/soon to be grandchild.

Xena: "Thanks." (She's just shooed away another suitor her mother has brought her, and turns to Cyrene for a heart to heart.) All right, I'm telling you for the last time politely, I do not need help finding a man!"
Cyrena: "No? But finding the right man, now that's a different story."
Xena: (Exasperated) "I'm beginning to remember why I left home so young."

Loved it when pregnant Xena punched out the guy after she turned his marriage proposal down and he countered with a request for some "casual sex". BUT nothing beats this exchange with Gabrielle...

Gabrielle: (Grabs Xena as she tries to run by) "Xena I, um I wanna ask you something."
Xena: (Glancing around, looking for more suitors to appear) "Well, make it snappy. I've got a lot of single Greek losers to turn down."

Speaking of Gabrielle, does everyone recall that in "Comedy of Eros" at the end of season 2, Baby Bliss put a spell on Draco to make him fall in love with Gabrielle? And at the end of the "day", Xena had Cupid leave the spell in place because "love suited" him?

I think Gabrielle regrets that decision, Xena.

"Always something there to remind me."
So... Draco is in love with Gabrielle, and she'll have NOTHING to do with him. (I "icked" with Gabrielle when his tongue licked her hand), while Gabrielle's attentions are definately somewhere else. Just "where" that is, however, is in doubt.

Cyrene loves her daughter enough to try and find her a "love"... not recognizing she may already have an "unconventional" one.
(has NOTHING to do with the ep: )

Jace, Joxer's older by half an hour brother, loves his baby bro. But Joxer will have nothing to do with him because he's embarrassed by his "flamboyance".

Joxer "loves" Gabrielle, but his fancy is drawn away by an Amazon "rocker chick" who pays him a little attention. Gabrielle is "sure" this match isn't made in heaven, and wants Xena's opinion.

Gabrielle: "What do you think about Amoria, for Joxer?"
Xena: (Shrugs) "Works for me."
Gabrielle: (AGHAST!) "Are you crazy?!"
Xena: (Taken aback) "Why did you ask me if you already have an answer?"
Gabrielle: (Its inconcievable!) "Because she's so wrong for him! He should be with someone that's like, like... "
(Do you remember me saying, a "few eps" ago, how Xena wasn't threatened by anyone's interest in Gabrielle? Check out her face when she now asks...)
Xena: (Dead serious) "... you?"
Gabrielle: (She stops to think, then shakes herself as she denies the implication...) "Come on, Xena."
Xena: (Reassured, the WP now decides to have a little FUN!) "Well, hey, if you're not gonna take him, it's not fair of you to stop someone else from tryin?"

Of course, when you have people who refuse to look reality in the face.. eventually you have to bring down the hammer... which Xena does with Cyrene quite musically.

Sisters are doing it for themselves: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GGe_yR6LIwI (What CENTURY are you living in?" Yeah, Xena, we've ALL been wondering that for 5 seasons!)

In the "battle of the bands" Draco has captured Gabrielle and locked her in a "go go dancer cage" with plans to kill her at the end of the number since she refuses to "love" him.

He's about to flood the cage with fire from his lyre (you have to see it to believe it) when he's distracted by some awesome lyre playing from one very perturbed Warrior Princess: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fvdMynYtk6M&feature=related

Gabrielle frees herself and escapes as Xena battles Draco's band (in the Usual/nonmusical "hand to hand" kind of way) Draco drops his lyre to pursue Gabby into the audience. This next vid has a lot of scenes from the ep's conclusion, but none of the music. (Any Gabby in white fringe is from the finale) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rDEmiuugKPw

Draco ultimately catches up with her, and Gabrielle defends herself with a borrowed staff, but loses it to Draco in the fight. Just as he raises it to strike, she finally gets a little "more help" from her friend who relieves HIM of the staff.

I like the rap they do at the end... unfortunately I can't find it online, so use your imagination (OR buy the DVD/CD!)

Xena: (Not sung, just REALLY ticked off!) "Show's over, loverboy."
Draco: (Starts rapping) "Rah-h-h-h-h-h-h! The name's Draco! Give me my props! 'Cause I'm the gee when the music stops!
Xena: I'm the baddest Momma jammer this side of Thrace. Your expression's gonna change when I'm in your face.
Draco: "No, I'm the baddest rapper there is, And you're the saddest there is, and that's the way it is.
Xena: You're just a copycat. That's where your head is at. You chase the rhythm from a place you was never at.
Draco: "Ain't nobody told you that payback's a mother?!
Xena: Heads up, my brother, 'cause here comes another.
Draco: "It's time to face the funk blastin' atcha! You better give it up 'cause you ain't gonna match my rhyme!
Xena: Just like old times, when you be trippin' in your own stuff, didn't know what.
Draco: "I'm the number one warlord, king of the horde, And I'm out to collect my reward.
Xena: Let's get it on 'cause I'm gettin' bored."
[Fight]

Well, if you recall their first fight in the pilot, you will smile at this one since it again involves standing ontop of various audience members as they go at it. I recognized one smiling gent Xena was standing on as the suitor who was "willing to settle for casual sex".

Natually, Xena wins the day and ties up Draco and the rest of the bad guys.

Unfortunately for Joxer... love is fickle as he watches his Amazon fawn over one of Draco's men. he and Gabrielle have a little heart to heart which has been shown in the interview clip... this was the part they didn't show on that clip...

Gabrielle: "I know I take advantage of you, Joxer, but I care about you."
Joxer: (Milking it for all its worth) "Hm-m?"
Gabrielle: "You mean a lot to me."
Joxer: "OK so, what are you doin' tonight?"
Gabrielle: "Not a chance in Tartarus."

Strangely enough, Xena's rendition of the WXP theme song on her lyre, not to mention her rap song won the contest too.

Jace: (Looking out at the audience from behind the stage curtain) "Xena! Come quick! The crowd's going wild! They want an encore!"
Xena: (Tying up Draco et al) "I'd love to, but I'm fresh out of asses to kick!"
Jace: "But you just won Terpsichore's lyre!"

And so Xena donates the Lyre to the people of Melodius as the gang all go on stage to sing the big finale while bridges are mended between brothers, mothers and daughters, and "soulmates".

People got to be free: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K6wx_qPTrSQ (In case you don't know... "watch" the credits through to the end... unless you are easily scared then quit early!)

This ep has definately grown on me! :bolian:

(Unrelated except for the odd clips from Lyre Lyre: Xena: The dancing Queen: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DDRcbvsbLbA&feature=related

Subtext the musical: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nPFl2GQb_Z0&feature=related )

saturn5 · Feb 28, 2011

Lyre, Lyre is a fun ep that suffers only in comparison with TBS (it's also the hundredth ep although they don't make a big deal about it). The songs are ok but not up to that much, last appearance of Draco. Great performance from Ted both as Jace but also as Joxer (check out his expression when he hears Jace's opening music, he KNOWS who it's going to be).
Gabby and Xena's expressions upon seeing him 'Another one!' are priceless.
Jace is actually mentioned as far back as season 2 so now we finally get to meet him, sadly for the only time. I do rather sympathise with Joxer when he takes Jace to task for claiming to be Iberian, reminding him he was actually born with him and Jett above the butchers shop on Olympic Street in Athens. Also like the Amazon having the eye for Joxer (but dumps him for Draco? straight girls and rockers huh? :wtf:

) and Gabby's very obvious jealousy, nice that Xena just wants the best for him a little Xexer subtext in what she says. Nice to see Cyrene again as well, all mothers the same even if their daughter is a warrior princess.
All told a very fun ep, Gabby invents go-go dancing, can't believe they got away with the pregnant gogo Xena at the end

JanewayRulz! · Feb 28, 2011

saturn5 said:
Lyre, Lyre is a fun ep that suffers only in comparison with TBS (it's also the hundredth ep although they don't make a big deal about it). The songs are ok but not up to that much, last appearance of Draco. Great performance from Ted both as Jace but also as Joxer (check out his expression when he hears Jace's opening music, he KNOWS who it's going to be).
Gabby and Xena's expressions upon seeing him 'Another one!' are priceless.

Jace is actually mentioned as far back as season 2 so now we finally get to meet him, sadly for the only time. I do rather sympathise with Joxer when he takes Jace to task for claiming to be Iberian, reminding him he was actually born with him and Jett above the butchers shop on Olympic Street in Athens. Also like the Amazon having the eye for Joxer (but dumps him for Draco? straight girls and rockers huh?) and Gabby's very obvious jealousy, nice that Xena just wants the best for him a little Xexer subtext in what she says.

Nice to see Cyrene again as well, all mothers the same even if their daughter is a warrior princess.

All told a very fun ep, Gabby invents go-go dancing, can't believe they got away with the pregnant gogo Xena at the end

The thing I love about "go-go Xena" is LUCY's reaction to the size of her belly in the funeral scene from "Seeds of Faith" on the commentary track.

HONEY, I screamed at the TV, if you think THAT's impressive, go back and rewatch the credits for "Lyre, Lyre..."!!! :guffaw:

You got to LOVE a woman with that much self confidence... ("well deserved" as Lucretia would say, when you compare those closing credits with the teaser in "Antony & Cleopatra" just a few months later. Hubba Hubba.)

JanewayRulz! · Feb 28, 2011

(Whoosh says epi 104, but we don't buy it!)

Episode 101 (faux 102) season 5 #11 "Punchlines"

In case you haven't noticed... our favorite X:WP 5'10 inch Kiwi actress has been progressing "very well, thank-you very much" in her real pregnancy this season, which means this is going to be a "Xena lite/clip show". But in the spirit of other Xena liteclip shows we actually see a fair amount of "new' Xena, which is aces with me. :bolian:

We also get to see Aphrodite again, which means "Slumber Party!" :bolian:

(How's the Portugese coming along?)

Teaser opens with Gabby in a very different outfit (Mauve Pajamas? I guess she bought these to replace the pink nightie that Joxer ruined. :guffaw:

) as she tries to defeat her writer's block while Xena sleeps "nearby" under her coat. I guess she doesn't like the lights Gabby has "on", so her head is "completely" covered. (I guess TPTB figured why pay her body double to "sleep" again like they did in "Little Problems", but I digress.

)

Aphrodite: "Boo!"
Gabrielle: (JUMPS!) "Aphrodite?"
Aph: "Can't sleep, huh?"
Gabrielle: (Exasperated at this new interruption) "You scared me."
Aphrodite [Sarcastically] "Sorry, I didn't know I had to knock in my own temple."
Gabrielle: (Looks over at the "mound" of covers that is purportedly Xena) "You don't, but can you just keep it down? I don't wanna wake Xena."
Aphrodite: "Pregnant girl needs her rest, huh? I remember when Cupid was on his way... "
Gabrielle: "Ah, doesn't a god of your, obvious stature have anything better to do than hang out here in the middle of the night?"
Aphrodite: (She knows sarcasm when she hears it!) "Oweeee! What's with the attitude?! I let you sleep in my temple. I show real concern for your insomnia, and you treat me like I'm a rash where the sun don't shine."
Gabrielle: (Repentent) "I didn't mean to be rude. Uh, I-I don't wanna bother you with my troubles."
Aphrodite: (She can be so "sweet" sometimes!) "Tsk, Sweet-pea-- I am immortal, you know? I got nothin' but time."

And so the counseling begins. Dr Aphrodite leads Gabrielle in a series of exercises to get her to reassess her bard skills and resume her previous "loves" by having Gabby "tell her' about today's adventure.

Paperback writer:
The day starts innocently enough, with Gabby giving name suggestions for the new baby, each of which is shot down by the mom to be.

Gabrielle: "How 'bout the name, `Rochelle.'"
Xena: "And have her called `Roach' for short? I don't like that."
Joxer: "How do you guys know it's gonna be a girl? Maybe, it'll be a boy."
Gabrielle: "All right. How 'bout `Aloysius?'
Xena: "That's not funny."
Gabrielle: "It was a thought. I'm glad we're almost to Pilos. I know someone who's getting a little hungry."
Joxer: "Oh, pregnant woman's hungry. There's news. Oh!"
Gabrielle: "And cranky."
Xena: (The lady doth protests) "Cranky? I haven't been cranky for years. Joxer, have you ever seen me cranky?"
Gabrielle: "Tell the truth, Joxer."
(Look at the fear coming over his face! Gabrielle might as well ask him to stop loving her!)

Cue the clips of Xena being cranky on Joxer's "a$$". :rommie:

Joxer: "No?"
Xena: "Hm-m."
Gabrielle: "Cop out. All right, Xena, it's not your fault with your condition and all."
Xena: "You're patronizing me." (Seems just 2 eps ago Gabby was accusing Xena of the same thing!) Gabrielle, I am in full control of my mood swings."
Gabrielle: "You wanna bet?"
Xena: "Anything you name."
Gabrielle: "How 'bout a month of cooking and cleaning that you can't go a whole day without losing your temper."
Xena: "You throw in back rubs and you got a deal."
Gabrielle: "It's a deal." (Xena spits in her hand then slaps Gabrielle's to seal the bargain) "Ow!"
Xena: (Smiles) "Doesn't count."

Ok... thats the set up. Of course, soon after that Gabrielle and Xena part. Gabby to the river to bath the horses, and Xena with Joxer to town to feed the pregnant lady.

Unfortunately for Gabby, she picked a spring belonging to the God of Despair to wash Argo... and that's a big "no-no". For her punishment, the God shrunk Argo to little pony size. Her back would probably meet Xena's mid thigh. :eek:

And Lacrymose, the God of despair WON'T turn her back unless and until Gabrielle can make him "laugh".

Gabrielle: "I'm glad you understand."
Aphrodite: "That's what I'm here for. So-- what did Xena do when she found out about the horse?"
Gabrielle: "Xena and I are best friends. There aren't any secrets between us."
Aphrodite: "Hm-m-m, you stalled, huh?"
Gabrielle: "Exactly."

So, while Gabby's trying to tickle Lacrymose's funny bone with tales of past X/G/J adventures, Xena and Joxer are having a quiet intimate dinner together, in the middle of a busy tavern, next to a crying baby.

Joxer: (Looking at baby) "Some set 'a lungs!"
Xena: "Oh, yeah-- swell." (She tries to wave at the crying child) " Kootchie-kootchie-koo."
Woman: (Kid shuts up immediately!) "Oh-h-h-h-h-h did that mean old warrior princess scare you? Yes, yes."
Joxer: "Nice move."
Man's Voice: "How are you?"
Xena: (AND the WP has some doubts) "Are you kidding me? I scared it mute. What kind of a mother am I gonna make?"

Gabby shows up to pay their bill and sends them shopping for supplies while she goes back to work on Lacrymose. Unfortunately, in her absence little Argo has pulled himself free and is now "lost".

Loved Gabby's explanation of the X/Argo relationship to Aphrodite...

Aphrodite: "So, you shrunk her horse and then you lost him. So, what?"
Gabrielle: "So, what? Do you know how important Argo is to Xena? Sometimes, I think she likes that horse more than she likes me. I can't count the number of times that Argo has saved Xena."

(The ULTIMATE Love triangle, Xena, Gabrielle and ARGO! :guffaw:

)

Xena has found the brother of a warlord she's put away, and he's looking for revenge throughout this ep. After her second encounter with him in the general store, she expresses her fears about all the villians any child of her's would have to face. That's when Joxer looks like he puts his "foot" in his mouth, only to "rise to the occasion" in the end.

Joxer: [Snickers] "Giants? Hades, that's the least of your
problems. Let's see, there's um dryads, "Harpies "
Man's Voice: "Find any?"
Woman's Voice: "Yeah."
Joxer: "Bacchae " [Chuckles] "Oh, sure that kid 'a yours is gonna encounter a host of problems. Let's see, uh, pestilence, disease foot rot misery but you know what, Xena? That kid's got something it couldn't get anywhere else."
Xena: "What?"
Joxer: (My hero!) "You."
Xena: (She agrees as she embraces him in a "headlock"? ) "Oh-h-h!"
Joxer: (Can't break free, and REALLY wants to!) "Ow. Ow. Ow."
Xena: "Oh, thank you. Thank you."

(Score one for the Xexers? )

Well... Gabby eventually finds Argo, she manages to tick off Lacrymos even more and gets her self shrunk to action figure size... JOXER manages to trick Lacrymos into making her larger while Xena is back at the general store, tired of waiting.

She walks into the tavern, looking for Joxer AKA as "seen anyone in a pointy hat?" and discovers there's a convention in town with pointy hats and NO sense of humor. As the crowd gets up to face the pregnant lady down, she whistles for the one friend who never deserts her...

Xena: (To the men in pointy hats) "Lighten up. Ah, now, that is devotion. Here, girl!" (Short Argo enters the tavern)
Men's Voices: (Very disrespectful of the horse formerly described as "too tall" by Gabrielle) "Look, a stray dog!" "They took a dog and put a horse head on it!" "Wow, what do you have to do? Add water?"
Xena: "Gabrie-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-elle! (Enter Gabby and Joxer) Gabrielle what is that?"
Gabrielle: (Hands up, trying to calm the pregnant lady) "I can explain."
Joxer: (NOT being helpful!) "Look at that! Cold water! She said `cold water!'"
Gabrielle: "Xena, now don't get mad. It's not good for the baby. OK, I, uh Xena all we have to do is make Lachrymose laugh. Then we can have Argo back to the way she was."
Warlord's Brother: "Say your prayers, Xena."
Xena: "Allelujah. All right." (And she pushes him head first into a table full of pies)
Joxer: "Hm-m-m-m?"
Xena: (Picks up two more pies and starts weighing them, which will she throw first as which friend?) "OK, now, I'm not mad" (Or cranky) "I'm just very, very disappointed." :guffaw:

And while the pie fight extraordinaire continues with the trio of friends, the guys in pointy hats and the warlord's brother... the god of despair wanders in and sits down in the middle of all the guffawing. Xena notes a pie stuck to the ceiling just above his head, and lets the chakram let fly just as she calls the god to "look up".

SPLAT!

Aphrodite: "A stupid, boring, unfunny excuse for a pie fight finally made him laugh?"
Gabrielle: "Go figure."
Aphrodite: "Huh? You must 'a been aiming too high the rest of the time."
Gabrielle: "I guess so."
Aphrodite: "You OK?"
Gabrielle: "This isn't working."
Aphrodite: "What's not working?"
Gabrielle: "I thought telling you the Lachrymose story would, somehow end my writer's block."
Aphrodite: "Oh, well. At least you got him in touch with his inner child."
Gabrielle: "That's it."
Aphrodite: "What?"
Gabrielle: "That's the answer."
Aphrodite: "What are you talking about?"
Gabrielle: "Ever since Xena became pregnant, I have been trying to find a way to make the world a better place and I've allowed no time for the things that make me happy like my writing. I think I've been too afraid that I've lost that part of me that's a bard. Anyway maybe my writing will help Xena's baby figure out who he or she really is."
Aphrodite: (Stands up to leave) "Well, it looks like my work here is done."
Gabrielle: "Wait. No."
Aphrodite: "What? You got a lot of catching up to do."
Gabrielle: "Thank you."
Aphrodite: "Don't thank me yet. Wait till ya get my bill."

These words:
Loved the last scene of the three friends walking away from the village and the pie fight. Xena came away unscathed with the promise of a month of backrubs. But she stops to turn back to the village when she hears a high pitched whistle, and a pie comes at her supersonic speed and SPLATS all over her face.

Not just HER face, but poor ARGO's too, who's innocently standing by her.

Xena: "Who threw that pie?"
Lacrymose [OC]: [Laughs]

:guffaw:

Xena & Argo:
More importantly, Lucy and Rob became parents to "young Julius" as Lucy called him in the commentary on another episode.

One wonders... if they had a daughter, would they have called her Callisto?

saturn5 · Mar 1, 2011

Stupid ep but very fun, especially love the Joxer/Xena doubleact, thinking of the Annie/Mattie/Harry hookup fanfic we talked about you can't help but think he'd make a good surrogate father for their kids as he proves with Meg and Virgil&co. Or we could have Hercules but just not Ares! Once again it seems that Xena and Gabby are happy to let Joxer pay for everything, where does he get his money? Mercenary for hire or does Jett let him and Jace have his ill gotten gains? To judge from the flashbacks (which are great!) the family are pretty well off, must be money in the butcher business

Weird thing is Gabby says she doesn't get India when she was the big fan? (the only one!)

If I have one favourite part of this ep it's Xena seeing shrunken Argo and then the flashbacks to her getting increasingly angrier until we see her as the demon Xena in Fallen Angel, cracks me up every time!

JanewayRulz! · Mar 1, 2011

saturn5 said:
Stupid ep but very fun, especially love the Joxer/Xena doubleact, thinking of the Annie/Mattie/Harry hookup fanfic we talked about you can't help but think he'd make a good surrogate father for their kids as he proves with Meg and Virgil&co. Or we could have Hercules but just not Ares! Once again it seems that Xena and Gabby are happy to let Joxer pay for everything, where does he get his money? Mercenary for hire or does Jett let him and Jace have his ill gotten gains? To judge from the flashbacks (which are great!) the family are pretty well off, must be money in the butcher business

Weird thing is Gabby says she doesn't get India when she was the big fan? (the only one!)

If I have one favourite part of this ep it's Xena seeing shrunken Argo and then the flashbacks to her getting increasingly angrier until we see her as the demon Xena in Fallen Angel, cracks me up every time!

XENA: OK, now, I'm not mad. I'm just very, very disappointed."

:guffaw:

JanewayRulz! · Mar 1, 2011

^^I feel a little guilty about not discussing the flashbacks... your evil Xena montage was a "good one", and this ep is also the last time we see (in flashback only) Autolycus. "Hey, I paid for an hour!"

In honor of the King of Thieves:

JanewayRulz! · Mar 2, 2011

Episode 102 Season 5 #12 "God Fearing Child"

Here's a snippet from Whoosh.org, with writer Manheim.

06-17-00. In the June 2000 issue of Chakram (#11), the newsletter of the Official Xena Fan Club, writer Chris Manheim was interviewed:

Interviewer: Was Hercules always part of the "God Fearing Child" story?
Chris Manheim: No. When I first wrote the story, Hercules was not in it. Xena and Amarice were busy trying to fend off Zeus. I think it was GABRIELLE AND JOXER who went to the Underworld to get the Helmet of Invisibility so Xena could give birth and be invisible doing it.
Interviewer: Was Solan in your version?
Manheim: No, he was an element added to give weight to the mother/son story with Xena. To provide heart to the Xena/Gabrielle portion. Before that, it was mostly about Hercules and Zeus.

I have to say... I'm GLAD they made the changes. I much prefer X/G teaming up to go after the helmet, and liked the added suspense/stress of Xena potentially going into labor in Hades.

"God fearing Child" Promo... in ENGLISH!

To view this content we will need your consent to set third party cookies.
For more detailed information, see our cookies page.

ZEUS has just gotten some bad news from the FATES, a child "not begotten by man" will herald his downfall. He is NOT pleased.

By now, you should know the drill. 30-60 seconds of humor before they hit us. Actually, we got about 20 sec of humor in 90 seconds of quiet... but I'm cool with that cuz it means we got HERCULES. :drool:

Xena: "Oh, Gabrielle. Come here, give me your hand." (She places her hand on Xena's abdomen) "No, no, here."
(Gabrielle gasps as Xena laughs)
Gabrielle: "That was a drop kick."
Xena: (Smiles) "I know."
Gabrielle: "Just like Mom."
Xena: "We are not alone."
Gabrielle: (Stops as she packs up their camp) "Xena, wait. I had a dream last night. You and I were both giving birth to your baby. It was like it was coming from both
of us." (Is this the 2nd time Gabby is actually showing her gift of prophecy?)
Xena: "That's very nice... You know, if I could give ya half the labor pains, I would do it."
Gabrielle: [Chuckles] "Well, sadly, that's not the case."
Xena: "This kid's going to change our lives completely."
Gabrielle: "Yeah. I'm gonna be-be more alert, Xena. I'm worried about its safety."
Xena: "We do seem to find our share of trouble."
HERCULES: "Yeah, like the big trouble you found when you forgot to tell an old friend of yours you were about to have a baby."
Xena: (Smiles broadly as she walks over to the big guy) "Hey, old friend, did you hear that I'm about to have a baby?"
HERCULES: "Well, then I would say congratulations are in order." (Hugs Xena) "Aw, it's good to see you. And you ..."(Hugs Gabrielle) "...wasn't your hair a little bit longer last time I saw you?"
Gabrielle: "I was gonna ask you the same thing."
Xena: "Who's your friend?" (Points to the 3 headed hydra stuffed monster Herc is carrying.)
HERCULES: "Oh, I, uh I named him Iolaus but he happens to be for you, or, should I say for your, child."

Well, hope you enjoyed the breather, since things are about to be hectic REAL fast!

Yeah... Herc is a little distracted "here" as he sees 6 warriors sneaking up from behind Xena. For her part, Mom has seen 6 warriors sneaking up behind Herc. Poor Gabrielle, watching both legends from the side, sees nothing until they are pointed out.

Our trio fight the bad guys (AKA Proxidicae), and once all but 2 are knocked out, we see Xena & Herc each interrogate their prisoners in tandem. That's when they discover ZEUS plans to kill Xena's child.

TEASER ends:

You'd think after all this time, these Gods would learn to avoid pissing off Xena!

After more fighting with the Proxidicae after Xena accidently reinvigorates 11 of them when she kills one. (HEY! He deserved it, he was about to kill Gabby), the trio escape and make plans. Herc is going home to find out why is father is trying to kill Xena's child, and persuade him against it. Xena plans to go to Tarturas with Gabrielle and steal the helmet of invisibility. If ZEUS can't find her, he can't kill her. Nor, for that matter, can HE protect himself FROM her!

If you remember season 1, you remember how Xena got to Tarturas... by diving into the middle of a lake. The only thing different this time, Gabrielle DOESN'T plan on waiting meekly on the beach for her Warrior Princess to return.

Gabrielle: "It looks so deep."
Xena: "It's the only way I know to get into Tartarus."
Gabrielle: "Are you all right?"
Xena: "It's always going to be this way, isn't it? My child will always face an uphill battle to be happy."
Gabrielle: "Xena, your baby won't have to do it alone. You will always be there."
Xena: "I couldn't save my son."
Gabrielle: "Xena, that was not your fault. We both have regrets about Solon. This is going to be different. You and I will dedicate our lives to protect your baby. Come on, you can't fail!"
Xena: "We won't fail. All right. Let's go."

In Tarturas, Xena is shocked to find her son, and frees him from his bondage to watch the events of his past life over and over. The reason behind him being in Tarturas was simple, sweet, and broke his Mother's heart.

Solon: "Mother?"
Xena: [Whispers] "Sweetheart. Solon. [Normal Voice] Solon, how did you get here? You're supposed to be in the Elysian fields."
Solon: "I didn't want to go."
Xena: "You chose this?
Solon: "Hades told me that in the Elysian fields, you don't even know you're dead. You just live the same day over and over thinking your family's gonna be home any minute but they never come. The next morning, it just starts all over again."
Xena: "That's so you don't miss the people you left behind."
Sol: "If not missing you means not seeing you I'd rather stay here. At least this way, I'd still get to be with you."

CUE Warrior Princess's tear ducts!

After running through the halls of tarturas, they are near their goal and Gabby goes ahead to scout their last approaches to HADES' Great hall.

Solon: "I don't wanna go."
Xena: "Solon I know what's best for you."
Solon: "I'll never see you again."
Xena: "Sweetie, you're gonna be so happy. Don't you wanna be happy."
Solon: "I wanna be with you."
Xena: "But you will. I'll come back to you, I promise. Now, come on."
Solon: "You just wanna take me to the Elysian fields 'cause you don't need me anymore."
Xena: "What are you talking about?"
Solon: "You have a new baby, now."
Xena: "Oooh listen, Solon. There's not a day that's gone by that I haven't thought about you. You've changed my life forever. You know why? There was a time when I wasn't a very good person. Then I had you and you were so beautiful. You were so perfect that I knew I couldn't be all bad. Looking back, you were a vision of hope. That's what you'll always be for me."

When You're gone:

To view this content we will need your consent to set third party cookies.
For more detailed information, see our cookies page.

Xena, Gabrielle and Solon finally make their way to the altar with the helmet of invisibility on it. Once there they discover HADES (A new one this year... and VERY familiar if you watched "Gods of the Arena" this past month. Think TULLIUS!) and a horde of Proxidicae. Xena and Gabby start "kung foo fighting", and Gabby eventually fights her way to the helmet which she puts on before HADES himself tried to behead her. Gabrielle now fights everyone easily as Xena and Solon sneak away. As they run for the passageway to the Elysian Fields, they meet up with an unexpected suitor.

BUT I'm getting ahead of myself.

Herc went to ZEUS, and got nowhere except to disown his Dad. Dad then went after his #2 fav son... ARES for help with Xena. ARES refuses to kill her, but is willing to kill Herc and off he goes with Dad's "blessing". He nearly succeeds, too except HERA the wife of ZEUS and the God responsible for killing Herc's family, shows up and knocks ARES out. :cardie:

Color Herc "as confused" as ARES, the concussion poster-boy. HERA plans to help him get a rib from the TITAN CRONOS, dead these many years at the hands of HIS son ZEUS. The bone has the power to kill a God. :eek:

ARES is always thinking, and quickly sees a way he can "survive" the loss of his Godhood, and goes to Tarturas to find Xena and make her an offer he figures she can't refuse.

Ares: "I thought I might find you here. That won't be necessary. In my brother's kingdom, I have no powers."
Xena: "Oh, good. Now I can really wipe the floor with you."
Ares: "You don't wanna do that."
Xena: "You're right, I'm in too much of a hurry."
Ares: "Xena, I wanna protect your unborn child from the other gods."
Xena: "Why would you wanna do that?"
Ares: "Well, I've had a falling out with Dad, and as you know, I've always had a thing for you."
Xena: (She NOTICED!) "For me and my friend. Look your stalking me is not helping the trust factor any."
Ares: "This is not your standard god obsession. OK? I'm having urges that I'm not real proud of."
Xena: "I'm not going to become your little warrior queen, Ares.
Besides, you expect me to believe you'd protect a child the fates say will destroy you?"
Ares: "They say it'll destroy all the gods. Now, if I'm gonna be mortal I could live out my life with you."
Xena: "What are you talking about?!"
Ares: "I have feelings for you. OK? I care about you, damn it."
Xena: [Interrupts as she turns away]X "Aw-- oh, no, no"
Ares: [Interupts] "I see your face everywhere."
Xena: (Waves him back) "Stop it! You stop it! You're so desperate you're trying to convince me that you love me. Well, go on. Say it. Say it. Say you love me." (Ares is silent) "The time for you and me has been and gone."
Ares: (Petulance does NOT become him) "It was worth a shot anyway. I thought in your present condition you might be a little more gullible."
Xena: (Indignancy, on the other hand...) "I am pregnant, not brain-damaged." (And she leaves Area behind while she and Solon make for the Elysian fields gateway)
Ares: "I love you, Xena." (He says to no-one.)

Xena and Solon make it to the gate, followed soon thereafter by Gabby with the helmet of invisibility. Xena makes a fateful decision, since HADES and the Proxidicae are between them and the gate. Solon will use it to run for the gate while she and Gabby distract hades et al. Of course, that means SHE won't be able to use it to attack ZEUS or to hide from him during the delivery. A delivery which is imminent, as her contractions have already started.

Xena: "Gabrielle give me the helmet quick. Gimme. Solon when I give you the word, I want you to put on the helmet and run for the gap. When I give you the word, OK?"
Solon: "Promise you won't forget me."
Xena: "I cross my heart and hope to die."
Solon: [Whispers something to Xena]
Xena: "That's a great idea. OK... love you." (Hugs him tightly) "I'll always love you. Get behind me, and wait for the word, all right?"
Gabrielle: "Are you ready for this?"
Xena: "As ready as I'll ever be."

And then, well, all hell breaks lose as Xena and Gabrielle charge the gateway and draw the Proxidicae away so that the invisible Solon can sneak safely past. Once on the otherside, he looks back and sees his Mom standing triumphant in Tarturas.

Solon: (No longer in tatters, but now in a while cloak with clean brushed hair and a new head band) "Mom, is that you?"
Xena: "Solon it's me, sweetheart."
Solon: "When are you coming home?"
Xena: "Soon, sweetheart. I promise. You won't even know I'm gone. Go on, now." (She watches her son turn from the gateway and run happily across the sundrenched field when suddenly she clutches her abdomen and moans) "Gabrielle!" (Moans yet again)
Gabrielle: (Stepping up once again to her duty, she catches Xena) "OK-- let's go home."

They entered Tarturas via lake, but exited it via a cave. Unfortunately, the Proxidicae are still in pursuit and once again the 2 women are fighting for their lives.

But this time, they get some much needed help in the form of HERCULES and the rib of CRONUS. Not only can it kill a GOD it can kill the Proxidicae without reinvigorating the others. Soon Herc and Xena have killed all the Proxidicae and Gabrielle has lead Xena to the shelter of a large tree before the Warrior Princess can go no further.

Xena: "Gabrielle, listen to me. I want you to get outta here. Get away from here. If Zeus gets past Hercules, I don't want you getting caught in the crossfire."
Gabrielle: "Xena, I'm not going anywhere, OK?"
Xena: [Moans]
Gabrielle: "Sh-h-h-h."
Xena: "Nah-h-h-h-h-h."

Interviews with Lucy/Renee/Director/Director of Photography. Loved the part of Lucy describing "real" birth and how they mimicked aspects of it... "LOVED" the growl of the "Transition Tantrum" (Be FOREWARNED, guys, if your S.O. is pregnant!)

Gabrielle: "Um hey do you remember-do you remember when Ephiny had her baby? Remember how you helped her?"
Xena: "Please, be quiet."
Gabrielle: "OK."
Xena: "Just be quiet."
Gabrielle: "Just breathe."

It was both scary and awesome, as we watched Gabrielle literally supporting Xena as she was giving birth, and HERCULES try his best to stop his father ZEUS from killing them.

(Oh, and that OTHER god who claimed to love her? He was off hiding with the three FATES, waiting to see how things turned out.)

Gabrielle is now kneeling before Xena, supporting the child as Xena makes the final few pushes. Xena is completely helpless at this moment as she looks up to see ZEUS standing over them, lightning bolts in hand... :eek:

(HERCULES: "Xena, I would die before I'd let anyone hurt your child.")

And Herc grabs the cracked rib of a dead Titan, body slams into ZEUS, and drives the rib into his father's midsection.

ZEUS:[Gasps] "You have sworn never to call me `Father' again--
but you will always be my son."
HERCULES: "This didn't have to happen!"
ZEUS: "Every son must eventually take his father's place like I did mine. Hercules you've never disappointed me especially today." [Exhales]
HERCULES: "Father. Father!"

The last scene is sweet, with Hercules sitting to Xena's left as Xena and Gabrielle are cradling the child. Xena looks over to the too quiet Herc.

Xena: "I'm so sorry, Hercules."
HERCULES: "All my life I've told people that they can live without
the gods. Now, I guess we'll find out. She's beautiful."
Xena: "Thank you."
HERCULES: "Have you thought of a name?"
Xena: "Her name is Eve."
Gabrielle: (This is news to Gabby!) "You've already named her?"
Xena: "Solon did when we were in Tartarus." (Herc nods towards Gabby and the two get uo to leave Mother and Child alone for the first time today.) "We're gonna be together now, Eve you and me and your brother, forever and ever." (She looks uo to the sunny, cloud strewn sky) "You hear that, Solon? Forever. Forever."

Let them be little:

saturn5 · Mar 2, 2011

Last appearance of Hercules and it's his best, a tragedy with Herc being forced to kill his father. We know of course that Herc is immortal and is still kicking around today posing as the actor Kevin Sorbo (whilst Iolaus lives to be 100). As you pointed out we never see Autolycus again either but we're told he settles down with his wife (porn star Traci Lords) and founds a bank.

Much kudos to Meg Foster too, the PERFECT choice to play Hera who once again goes from villain to tragic heroine, especially when Zeus kills his beloved wife/sister at what he sees as her betrayal. Meg is the queen of the B movies and pretty much makes anything she's in automatically better, interesting to contrast her performance here to her role in Masters of the Universe as Evilyn, sexy, classy, sinister and abandoning Skeletor when she realises he doesn't love her as she loves him ("Sound the retreat!"). A lovely lady but with the devils eyes, if you thought 'Nice contacts', no, they're her actual eyes!

Zeus and Hera dead, things will never be the same again in the Hercules/Xenaverse!

Forbin · Mar 2, 2011

I've always loved Meg Foster. Beautiful lady. I think it was a Mod Squad ep I recently watched, where she was a gorgeous hippy chick. Oh, those eyes!

JanewayRulz! · Mar 2, 2011

Meg Fosters eyes: http://www.megfoster.aretias.de/html/gallery.html

She WAS impressive, wasn't she! :bolian:

Re: Iolaus, I thought he died in HTLJ's ???? :confused:

(Does anyone really die on those shows?

)

Although I like Kevin Smith better with short hair, the shallow person in me likes Sorbo with the long hair much more. :drool:

(The REAL reason I never "took" to Andromeda :lol:

)

Any Xena:WP fans on the boards?

Vice Admiral

Fleet Captain

Vice Admiral

Vice Admiral

Vice Admiral

Vice Admiral

Vice Admiral

Fleet Captain

Vice Admiral

Vice Admiral

Fleet Captain

Vice Admiral

Vice Admiral

Fleet Captain

Vice Admiral

Vice Admiral

Vice Admiral

Fleet Captain

Fleet Admiral

Vice Admiral

Similar threads

We value your privacy