How to write a BDSM romance story

[Joe Washington]

I’m interested in writing a BDSM romance story and I’m wondering what’s the best way to do it. I’ve read my share of some other BDSM romance books and what I’ve noticed is that they don’t do a lot of exploring in the characters’ backgrounds and show us enough or any interactions with the characters’ families and friends. So I would like something like that in my story. Does anyone have other ideas?

 

[wamdue]

I was going to suggest "research" but it seems you already have that in hand.

 

[Stislak]

There's probably not much exploring because that's not what people care about. I wouldn't read a BDSM romance story for the characters, I'd read it for the BDSM romance.

 

[Hermiod]

All I can suggest is that you do not stereotype, do your research and try to portray the romance in a positive light.

 

[Broccoli]

Add vampires. They sell.

 

[WillsBabe]

Add vampires. They sell.

Also zombies. There's no story they won't liven up!

Seriously, though, I'd consider looking as yahoo groups and livejournal for discussion about this topic. I know they have writers groups there. asceml on yahoogroups might be a good port of call, too.

 

[Holdfast]

I was going to suggest "research" but it seems you already have that in hand.

 

[Shazam!]

Maybe watch Secretary?

 

[Joe Washington]

I already did and I absolutely love that movie. It's one of the reasons why I want to write a BDSM romance story.

 

[ToddPence]

Can't help ya. I don't write them, I just live them.

 

[Captain Dago]

"BDSM Romance"? Isn't that an oxymoron, like "military intelligence" or "jumbo shrimp"?

 

[Australis]

Write something that does for BDSM what Secret Diary of a Call Girl does for prostitution. OR what Dexter does for serial killers.

Keep in mind both those shows have the characters compartmentalise their lives. If you want the boss and the submitter (any gender) to be involved, that's a different story, and I dunno.

 

[sidious618]

Oh, this thread delivers.

 

[Hermiod]

"BDSM Romance"? Isn't that an oxymoron, like "military intelligence" or "jumbo shrimp"?

Some more advice, Joe Washington - avoid ignorant garbage like this and you'll be fine.

 

[Kibbin]

Can only add to what people have said above but I agree with avoiding most of what you find on the tinterwebs and don't just go for a standard bondage story with some romance. Do what Australias said and broden your scope, they may not seem relevant to your story now but ideas come from all sorts of places.
Introduce your characters first and set them up, make sure they stay well rounded and beliveable, ask why they are in this relationship.

 

[Holdfast]

Oh, this thread delivers.

No it doesn't.

It does kind of tease you like it's about to deliver though.

 

[sidious618]

Oh, this thread delivers.

No it doesn't.

It does kind of tease you like it's about to deliver though.

That's how I like it best.

Oh, sorry, wrong thread.

Wait, no it's not.

 

[Joe Washington]

I'm aiming for a character-driven love story involving two people who are flawed and have some issues that they are dealing with. But in the midst of their lives, they meet and form a connection which slowly develops into a passionate BDSM romance. We explore through them what a BDSM relationship is like and how in some ways it is different from a normal relationship and others it is not so different. We also take time to explore their relationships with the people close to them and their responses to the BDSM part of the main characters' lives. The story would be in the vein of Secretary and Six Feet Under.

 

[Australis]

That sounds good.

The problem I have (and I stress this is a personal view) is that BDSM is often portrayed as someone getting off on either the power or the submission. That can be part of the romance, but power/submission is more of a head game thing.

But if you can work around that, and make it appear genuine, then it'll be really powerful, and I think it's a good idea. Good luck with that.

 

[Mr. Laser Beam]

power/submission is more of a head game thing.

I see what you did there.