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DS9 Caption Contest #37: Deep Space Fun

LeadHead

Director of Comedy
Premium Member
Happy Saturday to all of you! Sorry I couldn't get the new contest up yesterday. Work will be picking up once the school year starts so I might be moving the start of the DS9 Contests to Saturdays on a more permanent basis. I'll see how things play out as we get a little further along. In the meantime, let me turn things over to Vreenak.


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First up to the plate, we have the "Hope you can move really fast back into that conduit" Award going to:

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Quark: HMPH--I'll show YOU that "the bird is the word"--

Rom: Brother, bad idea!

Worf: FERENGI, YOU WILL PAY FOR THAT GESTURE!!!


Next, we have the "Wonders of Futuristic Technology" Award, going to:

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Sisko was away on business and couldn't make their usual time, so he and O'Brien held their weekly staring contest via videochat.


Next up, we have the "Stubborn Kira" Award going to:

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Kira never listened when colleagues told her to "say it, don't spray it."

Next, we have the "Today is a good day for simulated Agriculture" Award, going to:

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Worf: "Rest, now. I will take this shift and attend to our FarmVille assets. It will be a glorious day to farm."


Next up, we have the "Will Riker would have done it" Award, going to:

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Bashir: "Then one of the Orion girls asked me if I knew what a 'Cardassian windmill" was, and that's when I said, 'I don't know, and I don't wanna know!'"
O'Brien: "Wuss!"

Our Photoshop Award goes to:

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Quark: (to Sisko) "Stooges? Who are these stooges you speak of?"



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WORF (typing): To: SupRDoc, MOBrien22, BucketOfFun, LatinumMan

Guys, I can confirm The spots go ALL THE WAY DOWN!

Also, I wanted to make sure you all saw this one...


Thanks to everyone who participated and congratulations to all of our winners!

Most of you are aware, but some of you might not get over to the TNG Forum much, right now we're running the TNG Character Caption Contest Showdown there. 3 great captions are going against each other in a voting round open to all users!

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Head on over and vote!

There are a few more weeks left to it, once it is concluded. We'll start the DS9 Character Caption Contests. Each contest will have a new character getting some well deserved attention. More on that later. For now, we have a new contest!


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Enjoy!
 
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Sisko: Deploy the teams, we will win this game of Phaser Tag.


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Dax: Poppies....

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Bashir: I still can't see anything.

Odo: Use your open eye, Doctor.


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Sisko is a Hands On Commander.

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Kira: Right below this deck, is the Treasure!
 
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Tobin and Lela have a thumb war.

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Odo: "The Bajoran Fund for Orphans needs as much as it can get, as soon as possible, doctor".

Bashir: "I know. I think I found Quark's donation. Give me a few more minutes".

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Kira: "Okay, so we worked it all out. I got to keep the baby and you, while Keiko got the entire contents of the shared quarters. I threw in your dart board and she accepted".
 
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Kira: So tell me, Mr. O'Brian, what will it take to get you into this apartment today?
O'Brian: Well, I'm really looking for a proper home. I want some equity, see.
 
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SISKO: Damn, whats with all the lights?

WORF: Ensign Abrams, sir. He is without honor.


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DAX: And God bless Benjamin and Kira and Julian...

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ODO: Whats with the antique?

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SISKO: That Crusher kid was right. Sweaters are a chick magnet.

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OBRIEN: You wanna wrap up your long lecture on the "Bajorian way" vs "the Federation Way", Major? I got a dart game at Quarks.
 
Thanks for the win, mate! :techman:

Okay, let's do this...

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Worf: We should have wide-beam phasers for this kind of deal.

Sisko: How many up there?

Worf: Three or four....

Sisko: That's counting our guy?

Worf: Not sure.

Sisko: So there could be up to five guys up there.

Worf: It's possible.

Sisko: (sighs) We should've brought frakin' wide-beams....

(long pause)

Worf: Come on--let's get into character.

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Jadzia's got a secret...and for once, she is NOT going to tell.

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Bashir: According to these readings, your diet for the past few weeks have consisted solely of raktajino.

Odo: Hmph! It's been a long week. I've had to stay up that long without the need to regenerate--

Bashir: Of course, but your physical stamina has suffered.

Odo: And that's why my face has thinned out?

Bashir: That's what it looks like.

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Sisko had not been informed of the unintended side effects of Robau-brand Cologne....

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Visitor: For the LAST TIME...you stand on the rectangle on the floor for this scene! That's what it's THERE for!

Meany: Sheesh. Who appointed you the director?

Director: (off screen) She's right, you know!

Visitor: Thank you!
 
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Sisko: "It's a war arc, Mr. Worf."

Worf: "Let's find something big. And blow the shit out of it."

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O'Brien: "Yes. That's very interesting, Dax. Just keep telling me about Tobin's vacations. I'll be in this turbolift, running a diagnostic. Don't turn around if you hear the motor. It's just the diagnostic I'll be running."

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Bashir: "It appears to be a prop, Constable. Perhaps you should break the fourth wall for those results."

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Sisko: "Major Kira decided to lend me a hand. Or two." (laughs)

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O'Brien: "Right, well whatever thing you're telling me about Bajor is interesting, so just keep telling me. Don't mind me, I'll just be running a diagnostic in the hallway."
 
Thanks for the Photoshop pick, Leadhead. :)

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Worf: "I don't care if the nightclub has a no arms policy. Chicks dig guns."


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O'Brien felt so guilty... it was his transporter system that mysteriously gave Dax six fingers on each hand. But for some bizarre reason, she didn't seem to mind.

Dax: "Twelve fingers. Oh, the things I'd do to Worf with these." (grin)


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Kira (OS): "I'm glad you enjoyed it, Benjamin. And now... your turn. (puts a cooking apron on him). Make me breakfast."


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As soon as Kira started snapping her fingers, Miles knew that the dancing lessons were a very bad idea.
 
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O'brien: Has anyone seen my sonic manipulator? I could swear I left it up here.

Dax: mmmm... hm? Wha?
 
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Sisko was indeed in the hands of the prophets..

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Jadzia: Oh, Quark, your lobes are so big.... (to herself): I'm gonna win this tongo game in less than 5min!
 
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Sisko: Madam Troi, you're not on the Enterprise, and I may be bald, but I'm NOT Picard..
 

Miles: "Lt. Dax! The warp core is about to breech, the Promenade is overrun with vile aliens and there's a Klingon cruiser on a collision course!"

Jadzia didn't care-after a night with Worf she didn't care about much of anything...
 
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Curzon frequently spent entire afternoons flirting with Jadzia's reflection.


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Odo: "If you're done, we really should return Molly O'Brien's kaleidoscope."
Bashir: "In a minute. Oooooh, pretty!"


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Bashir: "Not to worry, sir. I'm sure nobody will be able to tell that these new prosthetic hands aren't your original hands."


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Kira: "Sorry, Chief, but it turns out that every single thing you've ever owned was actually a Changeling infiltrator."
O'Brien: "Bloody torture O'Brien episodes!"
 
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Sisko: Madam Troi, you're not on the Enterprise, and I may be bald, but I'm NOT Picard..
Troi: "But... you aren't bald."
Sisko: "I... Say again?"
Troi: "You aren't bald! See in that mirror? Hair."
Sisko: "What? Dammit! No wonder I was kicked out of the Fraternal Order of Robau Impersonators."
 
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KIRA: I warned you Chief. You shoud have locked your doors. The Bajorans are all theives.
If it aint locked up or tied down they'll nick it .


OBRIEN: Arent you Bajoran?

KIRA: Precisely. Now how much would you pay for a holo of your sainted mother?
 
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O'Brien: "You want me to do what, major?"
Kira: "You heard me. I want a hot tub installed, right here. I know you can do it--I saw what you did for Keiko in her bathroom."
O'Brien: "But that was just a bidet!"
 
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Kira: "Chief, I don't care what you do in your spare time, but this your lunch break and... wait, I just felt something... is Julian down there??!!"
 
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