Inappropriate Talk at the Dinner Table

[Trekker4747]

I suspect many of you grew up with the idea of not having crude conversation/talk at the dinner table. Specifically talking about disgusting things or sights or bodily functions, etc.

Did everyone do this and does it make sense to everyone?

Growing up we never had much problem with discussing these types of things around the table -naturally we wouldn't do it in more formal situations- as everyone I suppose had a solid enough stomach and appetite that they wouldn't be turned off their meatloaf by the mention of "poop."

 

[auntiehill]

^In my home, restrictions only came when adult company was over and then we weren't supposed to speak unless spoken to. But generally, we were taught to not be gross, vulgar or rude in general, regardless of whether food was being served or not. It's just common courtesy.

My husband and his friends, however, were not, apparently, raised this way.

 

[Captain_Nick]

My parents tried, god bless them, but they couldn't kill my inner troll

 

[TEACAKE'S PLEATHER DOME]

We talked about anything and everything. Loudly. There was no special censoring going on just because food was present. I don't know why food mysteriously gets treated like a 5 year old in the room but that seems to be the case.

 

[Deranged Nasat]

I wouldn't say there were rules as such (formal rules were never really that big a thing in my family), but we all seem to share an aversion to certain topics when food is present (we're a bit sensitive in that regard, for some reason). So, no, none of us would talk about "poop" or other realities of the less than sanitary kind while eating. Then again, we tended not to talk over the dinner table very much anyway.

I guess we were all a bit overly protective of food. For example, I never liked eating around other people unless they were close family; I still don't. I guess there's a part of me that shrieks "UNCLEAN!" like some sort of irrational inner chorus; it doesn't want the food to get dirty or contaminated somehow. I think the aversion to poop discussion has something to do with that. Keep in mind I've had mild hypochondria much of my life. Strangely enough actual food preparation is something that doesn't provoke any great protectiveness. Who knows what odd logic governs my responses?

 

[Robert D. Robot]

When I was a TA for Biology in college, I remember having a discussion in the dining hall with a couple of other grad students about the dissection lab that we had just helped out with. For us, innards and organs were just innards and organs, but we apparently grossed out a few students at a nearby table. We were not joking or trying to gross anyone out, we were simply "talking shop". It may as well have been a conversation about engines by a bunch of mechanics. Kind of funny when you think that those around us were eating the insides of animals similar to what we were dissecting.... Why weren't they grossed out at the thought of what they were actually sitting there eating?

Of course, we changed our conversation to minimize discomfort. I would not talk about such subjects if I knew someone was uncomfortable visualizing what was being discussed. But I don't find the body and its parts gross or disgusting. The body is cool and amazing.

Poop, on the other hand.... I won't talk about at the table!

 

[TrickyDickie]

My parents both grew up around farms in the 1930s and maybe that's part of the reason that nothing was off-limits to speak about at the dinner table. Sex, bodily functions, etc were just normal things in nature as evidenced from the animals on the farms, and people were just part of nature too.

We all had vivid imaginations, but words didn't affect our eating.

When company was in, or we were out visiting, we adjusted our conversations appropriately to fit the situation.

 

[scotpens]

When I was growing up, it was in bad taste to use certain words or bring up certain subjects at the dinner table. And in my family, bad taste was only slightly less egregious than murder.

We talked about anything and everything. Loudly. There was no special censoring going on just because food was present. I don't know why food mysteriously gets treated like a 5 year old in the room but that seems to be the case.

Because mention of things like bodily functions, blood, sweat, pus, excrement, urine, vomit, gory accidents, and squashed dead animals in the road can put a lot of people off their appetite.

 

[TEACAKE'S PLEATHER DOME]

Truthfully we were all trolls and putting people off their appetite was something of a goal. Which desensitized us from an early age.

 

[shivkala]

In my family there was acceptable at dinner, acceptable with guests, acceptable at someone else's house, and acceptable eating in public. My parents made sure we knew the difference and it was never a problem.

My father is never one to let a joke go by and that set the tone for many a dinner. Then there was an unfortunate phase I went through where I would spit out my drink while laughing that was often commented on. We also would never suppress a necessary burp and the topic of vomit came up (pun intended) from time to time.

But, as I said, we knew better to carry on like this when others joined us, be it my grandparents, family friends, my friends, or my sister's friends.

 

[scotpens]

. . . My father is never one to let a joke go by and that set the tone for many a dinner. Then there was an unfortunate phase I went through where I would spit out my drink while laughing that was often commented on.

SPIT TAKE!

 

[Holdfast]

In my family there was acceptable at dinner, acceptable with guests, acceptable at someone else's house, and acceptable eating in public. My parents made sure we knew the difference and it was never a problem.

Pretty much this for me too.

I grew up in a family of doctors, so our private dinner conversations were frequently amusingly graphic.

As with you, I always knew there was a difference between what we could talk freely about at home or with other medical family friends, and what would fly in other settings.

 

[SmoothieX]

Only time things were off limits was if we had company and wanted to be gracious hosts. Otherwise nothing was sacred.

I was married to a biomed type for a while. I'd come in with talk about a faulty septic tank, and she'd mention rat guts.

 

[Trekker4747]

Yeah, if company is around we curb the crass talk, but otherwise bathroom humor/discussions (my mom operates a daycare so that should help you out) and stuff along those lines is open to discussion. Oddly we tell my 8-year-old niece to watch what she discusses.

 

[Ar-Pharazon]

When I were a lad, we had a small B&W TV on the kitchen table. That way we didn't have to talk to each other.

 

[The Dominion]

There were no actual restrictions to speak of, but we might yell at each other if someone went too far. Both my parents were nurses at one point, so there was medical discussion and nobody cared.

 

[Nerys Myk]

My mother was constantly telling us, "that's not table talk."

 

[Bob Karo]

Many of my family are in public service and my grandfather was a cop. I'm in EMS. My mother and father never agree on what is and isn't "inappropriate" at the table. I try to limit myself if people seem to get uncomfortable. But honestly, people need to be careful when they ask "How's work?"

 

[Dukat's Major]

Depends on who's in the majority. If it's the Christians, then Christian stuff is okay. If it's the atheists, then religion is a no-no. If it's the liberals, then pro-lib stuff is du jour and libertarian stuff's a no-no. You get the picture. My family's pretty well split down the middle on most things.

 

[Sky]

My mother was constantly telling us, "that's not table talk."

Mine too.