Difference between a friendship and a relationship besides sex?

[bigdaddy]

I have been thinking about relationships and friendships, and the only different between the two seem to be sex. You care about each other in both, you can love each other in both, you can hold each other and hug each other. You talk openly and express yourself probably even more in friendship than you do in a relationship, at least in the beginning.

So is the only difference between the two sex?

 

[Jetfire]

I was with a girl, we broke up and she wanted to be friends...and still have sex??? Friends with benefits??? I couldn't do it...I wanted what we had before...not that. I know people who are friends and have sex all the time and nothing romantic is going on.

 

[Brent]

The differences between friendship and relationship is in the meaning of the 'ship. I have a relationship with my family, which is different than a relationship between two couples. A relationship (in the terms of couples) goes farther than a friendship because it is an understood exclusivity, that you and I will only date each other, we are a "couple" But I have a relationship with with family because we are related, by blood. I believe that sex is not a part of a relationship, but rather a marriage.

 

[auntiehill]

In a friendship, you only want it to be a friendship. In a relationship, you want more. You want exclusivity. You want to live together. You may want to have children together. You want sex or at least romantic intimacy with that person.

I have had guys friends, and we were just friends. There was nothing sexual about it. We liked to talk, go to movies and joke around. There was nothing more to it than that, and no desire for it to go further than that. But in a relationship, romantic feelings come into play--with any luck, with both people feeling that same way at the same time. Unfortunately, many friendships end when one person has the romantic feelings and the other does not.

 

[Lonemagpie]

It's one of these things where we need to reclaim the dictionary...

A friendship is one means of relating to another person- it is one type of relationship.

 

[bigdaddy]

I was with a girl, we broke up and she wanted to be friends...and still have sex??? Friends with benefits??? I couldn't do it...I wanted what we had before...not that. I know people who are friends and have sex all the time and nothing romantic is going on.

Yeah... this goes to my next point....

A relationship (in the terms of couples) goes farther than a friendship because it is an understood exclusivity, that you and I will only date each other, we are a "couple" But I have a relationship with with family because we are related, by blood. I believe that sex is not a part of a relationship, but rather a marriage.

See and this is where everything falls apart. No one follows that rule anymore, there are casually dating and open relationships. I met a new friend and he has a "boyfriend" but not really. It's actually why I brought this question up. There is no such thing as exclusivity anymore. Everyone just wants to screw everyone else.

In a friendship, you only want it to be a friendship. In a relationship, you want more. You want exclusivity. You want to live together. You may want to have children together. You want sex or at least romantic intimacy with that person.

But what is a friendship? I have a friend in which we had loads and loads and loads of sex but never dated. We love each other but we know we wouldn't ever get married and have children and our friendship is still great.

A friendship is one means of relating to another person- it is one type of relationship.

YES! I say relationship as in a friendship but friendships are relationships. People look at me like I have 10 heads. I dated someone for like a month, we became friends, so I say relationship because it includes the dating and the friendship and no one gets that.

 

[Brent]

See and this is where everything falls apart. No one follows that rule anymore, there are casually dating and open relationships. I met a new friend and he has a "boyfriend" but not really. It's actually why I brought this question up. There is no such thing as exclusivity anymore. Everyone just wants to screw everyone else.

Not everyone does, I don't think you can group everyone together and say that everyone wants to just screw everyone else, maybe that is only the people you are around. There are people of varying convictions on the subject.

 

[fek'lhr1]

Friends don't usually love each other in a 'romantic' way.
At the risk of sounding cliched, I'm love my friend but I'm not in love with them. The same with my dad, my bunnies, and my Star Trek memorabilia. Love them all but not romantically.
There are differences in the actual relationship that other have pointed out but since when does anyone have fiery passionate feelings of love about their friend? Someone wow wants to be in a relationship with said friend.

 

[auntiehill]

But what is a friendship? I have a friend in which we had loads and loads and loads of sex but never dated. We love each other but we know we wouldn't ever get married and have children and our friendship is still great.

That's not a friend; that's a fuck-buddy.

 

[nevermore]

See and this is where everything falls apart. No one follows that rule anymore, there are casually dating and open relationships. I met a new friend and he has a "boyfriend" but not really. It's actually why I brought this question up. There is no such thing as exclusivity anymore. Everyone just wants to screw everyone else.

Not everyone does, I don't think you can group everyone together and say that everyone wants to just screw everyone else, maybe that is only the people you are around. There are people of varying convictions on the subject.

Yet you group all "relationships" together as being "exclusive". Expectations of exclusivity, marriage, procreation, or cohabitation are not a priori requirements for a romantic relationship. People can be in committed, happy relationships and want only some of those things. Or none of them.

 

[RJDiogenes]

Every relationship is unique. Romantic relationships are usually governed by cultural and personal expectations that for the most part still involve exclusivity, but they are still friendships (except in those sad cases where the relationship endures past the friendship).

Plus which, Romantic relationships make you all giggly and silly.

 

[Lonemagpie]

Friends don't usually love each other in a 'romantic' way.
At the risk of sounding cliched, I'm love my friend but I'm not in love with them. The same with my dad, my bunnies, and my Star Trek memorabilia. Love them all but not romantically.
There are differences in the actual relationship that other have pointed out but since when does anyone have fiery passionate feelings of love about their friend?

There are many different kinds of love, and one can certainly be passionate in all of them - after all, passion means to throw onesself into the emotion, be it love, hate, fear, etc.

You can have love of someone, for someone, etc, as well as being in love with someone.

People also generally seem to feel that being a lover replaces being a friend, and that being a spouse replaces being a boyfriend/girlfriend, etc... But actually it's cumulative. For example, my wife is also my friend, my girlfriend, my lover...

I think if more people got that, there'd be more happiness and less stress. But tabloids would go out of business.

 

[K'Ehleyr]

...
Plus which, Romantic relationships make you all giggly and silly.

I like this explaination best.

With romantic relationships you have the 'Va va voom' ~ the inexplicable desire for each other, the want to dress up and be attractive to the other person, the wanting to please them and have fun, make each other laugh.
And the wanting to care, look after and protect that person.

Unfortunately in some romantic relationships you forget that you should be 'friends' also. You can tend to take your partner for granted and say things that you would not say to a friend. So that's my piece of advice for relationships ~ don't say anything to your partner that you would not say to a friend.

I have girl friends from years ago, who I love deeply and who I am in contact with regularly; I've had 'sex buddies' who I can't remember and don't miss; I've got Exs that I despise ~ mainly due to my appalling judgement at the time and one, my first love, who I do wonder what he's up to but know it would not have worked.

So Bigdaddy, my answer is the difference between a friendship and a relationship is the feeling you get in you stomach when you are going to see said person!

Lonemagpie we must have been writing at the same time, but seem to have the same view

 

[John Picard]

I would say that the difference is $100

 

[DonIago]

If I can hold hands (comfortably) with them I'm in a relationship, and it doesn't matter whether we're exclusive. If I can't, no matter how much sex we're having, it ain't a relationship.

Relationships involve a higher degree of emotional attachment (and at least in my world some physical manifestation of that). Sex is immaterial to the question...though I'd certainly hope there was some of that going on.

 

[Mr. B]

In my mind, a "relationship" is a friendship with the added desire for physical intimacy and all that stuff about kids and living together.

 

[DonIago]

Living together sure, but I'm not sure even a relationship will ever address the question of whether I ever want kids.

 

[Kestra]

What a silly question! A friendship is also a relationship. It's a broad term that encompasses many social bonds.

 

[bigdaddy]

Plus which, Romantic relationships make you all giggly and silly.

I have to say that is the best way I have ever heard it put.

 

[RJDiogenes]

...
Plus which, Romantic relationships make you all giggly and silly.

I like this explaination best.

Thank you.

Plus which, Romantic relationships make you all giggly and silly.

I have to say that is the best way I have ever heard it put.

And thank you, too.