Yeah, I stopped looking and it got me nowhere.
Dating
- Thread starter PluckyNinja
- Start date
That's pretty much how I see it. Although at this stage, I guess I don't really care enough anymore to invest a great deal of effort. I've become old and inflexible.
That said, I did recently have dinner with the lady who informed me via text message that she only wanted to be friends after a couple of months; we wound up chatting for about three hours. I think ambiguity is setting in.
^Welcome to my world 
I'm very good friends with a girl who with I would like to take it further but in the past she's made it clear that she at the moment don't want to be together with anyone at this point in her life. Yet it seems we keep getting closer and close and frankly I'm starting to get confused as to how she sees our relationship. I would love the be togheter with her as her boyfriend, but don't want to risk not remaining even her friend if she's not intrested.
I'm very good friends with a girl who with I would like to take it further but in the past she's made it clear that she at the moment don't want to be together with anyone at this point in her life. Yet it seems we keep getting closer and close and frankly I'm starting to get confused as to how she sees our relationship. I would love the be togheter with her as her boyfriend, but don't want to risk not remaining even her friend if she's not intrested.
I fear I'm much to polite to do much snatching I'm afraid
I used to think that way. I'm starting to wonder now whether there's a distinction between politeness and cowardice when it comes to women. Still haven't worked through the question entirely yet.
They say what actually arouses a woman, is the feeling of being desired more than anything else. It's most women's number one fantasy to be literally swept off her feet, because the man is just that overcome with desire. Apparently, this is a fundamental basis of what gets a woman's engine running. However, when the right man does this, it's welcome and sexy, the wrong man, and it's dial the police time. So you have to be willing to take that risk. And taking that risk is what might show your worth, only ifshe were wavering to begin with. If it's hopeless, it's hopeless.
As to myself, I'm not sure if it's true, it probably happens at a deeply unconscious level, and isn't dealt with by the rational mind.
And here, I've been waiting for you in Gretna Green all these years.
Thinking like that will be what dooms you to being alone forever.
Link please.
This was a wonderful paragraph up until the last nine words.
^ Just stating a terrible double standard that exists among women... sowwy!
It's not a double standard at all - if you like and want someone, you'll welcome their advance, if you don't you will not. That's not a double standard, that's human nature - and something present in men as well.
Yep. Contrary to the stereotype men will NOT sleep with just anybody.
I'm all for taking some risks, but not if they land me in jail!
Seriously, though, I tend to avoid the cookie-cutter advice and treat each situation or person individually. That way I'm not falsely trying to fit into some sort of perceived mold.Monsters of the id! Monsters of the id!
I'm not "hot" so the police call is the most probably outcome.I fear I'm much to polite to do much snatching I'm afraid
I used to think that way. I'm starting to wonder now whether there's a distinction between politeness and cowardice when it comes to women. Still haven't worked through the question entirely yet.
They say what actually arouses a woman, is the feeling of being desired more than anything else. It's most women's number one fantasy to be literally swept off her feet, because the man is just that overcome with desire. Apparently, this is a fundamental basis of what gets a woman's engine running. However, when the right man does this, it's welcome and sexy, the wrong man, and it's dial the police time. So you have to be willing to take that risk. And taking that risk is what might show your worth, only ifshe were wavering to begin with. If it's hopeless, it's hopeless.
As to myself, I'm not sure if it's true, it probably happens at a deeply unconscious level, and isn't dealt with by the rational mind.
Besides I decided earlier today give the fuck in and just not entertain the idea of me getting together with a girl. It just keeps leading me to pain again and again and again.
Actually what triggered the "heeeeey" reflex in this situation is I went over to talk her out of buying ALL of them and we got talking and she said "too bad we don't have replicators... though I wonder if they'll remember Hot Pockets the 24th century."
Good god in heaven..
If that had happened to me i think my brain would have popped and i'd stand there mouth wide open with possibly the dumbest grin ever conceived
You are such a lucky man!
Last edited by a moderator:
Can someone help me?
I don't see my "Snatch this User" button....
Also: were is the "bedroom eyes" function....
I don't see my "Snatch this User" button....
Also: were is the "bedroom eyes" function....
Hee hee. Snatch.
Flukie, juvenile.
Flukie, juvenile.
You'll do a better job attracting women if you're self-confident without being overbearing or cocky, with a touch of self-deprication. Come across with a good sense of humor and they'll warm up to you. Don't try to get into their pants, make an attempt to be their friend. Every woman, every single one, has at least one female friend who is in your boat, who has no confidence, who would like to find someone, and making a woman your friend is the key to finding her. And I have discovered that quite often they're generally hotter than the one you were pursuing, whether hotter looking, or more like-minded and appealing to your sense of intelligence. I had more hook-ups with female friends of my ladyfriends than I did striking out on my own. And while you're at it, check out older women...having a younger guy check them out appeals to their sense of vanity. I'm a happily-married guy in his 40s, but the hands-down most wild sex I ever had was when I was 22, with a lady who was 33. Every once in a while I'll be somewhere, smell a certain perfume, and immediately get a pinky.
Sorry to digress.
Anyway, the last thing you want to do is to appear pushy or desparate. Women can smell desparation. Like dogshit. When they smell that, or otherwise sense it (such as your willingness to immediately adjust your schedule to accomodate changes in theirs), they feel they have the upper hand and since it's no longer a challenge to them, you'll remain alone. It's a far stretch to say there's someone for everyone out there...but there are, to coin a phrase, a lot of fish in the sea, and if you keep on meeting people and having an open mind and establishing friendships with women (never understimate the chubby or homely ones...every woman has her own charm), and ultimately you will find someone who you can enjoy time with. Will that lead to something more? Who knows? But it doesn't happen overnight. It requires time and patience and effort. Saying "Hang in there, buddy" implies it will happen without effort. It is more likely to happen if you're out there circulating yourself, making friends, getting to know people, networking, and establishing friendships with women without the expectations of trying to get into their pants, which women can detect a mile away and generally find off-putting. Oh, and one last thing...women enjoy the company of the bad boy, but end up marrying the reliable grown-up man.
Hope this helps.
Sorry to digress.
Anyway, the last thing you want to do is to appear pushy or desparate. Women can smell desparation. Like dogshit. When they smell that, or otherwise sense it (such as your willingness to immediately adjust your schedule to accomodate changes in theirs), they feel they have the upper hand and since it's no longer a challenge to them, you'll remain alone. It's a far stretch to say there's someone for everyone out there...but there are, to coin a phrase, a lot of fish in the sea, and if you keep on meeting people and having an open mind and establishing friendships with women (never understimate the chubby or homely ones...every woman has her own charm), and ultimately you will find someone who you can enjoy time with. Will that lead to something more? Who knows? But it doesn't happen overnight. It requires time and patience and effort. Saying "Hang in there, buddy" implies it will happen without effort. It is more likely to happen if you're out there circulating yourself, making friends, getting to know people, networking, and establishing friendships with women without the expectations of trying to get into their pants, which women can detect a mile away and generally find off-putting. Oh, and one last thing...women enjoy the company of the bad boy, but end up marrying the reliable grown-up man.
Hope this helps.
Urg... but you *do* want to get into their pants, so it's disingenuous to pull that "I'm a nice guy who wants to be your friend" crap.
Oh and *never* say to a woman anything like "I'm a nice guy" or "why do women not go for nice guys" because nice guy is always code for "whiner".
JoeZhang is absolutely 100% correct...you never tell them you're a "nice guy", because nice guys finish last, and that is also code for whiner, and (not to sound misogynistic or anything) women don't want to hear us whine...that privilege is reserved for them. Ladies, am I wrong? You don't really TELL them you just want to be their friend; you just treat them like anyone else, not any more special because they're a girl, but not like they're not important, either. And, yes, it is a tad disingeneous, but women are so used to us trying to get into their pants that it kind of takes them aback when they DON'T have to deal with that from a guy, for a change. It puts them at ease, and when they're not on the defensive they're easier to talk to.
Ladies on the BBS, I am posting this based on my dating experiences from the mid-to-late 80s. Since 1990, it's just been Mrs. SicOne, and I have always found her refreshingly easy to deal with. Any observations past 1990 have been made observing friends and family. If there's any good advice that the BBS ladies want to put out there, I'll cheerfully yield the floor...
Ladies on the BBS, I am posting this based on my dating experiences from the mid-to-late 80s. Since 1990, it's just been Mrs. SicOne, and I have always found her refreshingly easy to deal with. Any observations past 1990 have been made observing friends and family. If there's any good advice that the BBS ladies want to put out there, I'll cheerfully yield the floor...
Similar threads
