Dating tips.

[Stardate]

I am in short of jam and need some advices. I want to ask a woman out but i am little shy about asking her upfront. I am not sure if she is interested in me but i think my brother wife who knows her are trying to hitch her up with me. She is not native but fugitive from Middle East but she speaks excellent English.I have meet her couple of times briefly (3-4 times) and last time i got her phone number. She needed a help about address for computer company. So i sent her the information about it via sms and she send me reply me almost right away. Thanking me(Thanks dear).
Later that week i got sms from by brother that she sent best regard to me when she was visiting. So i am wonerering that if it is ok to ask her out via sms or not.
I have been single for quite a time so i am little rusty in dating apartment.
p.s. i cant believe i am posting this.

 

[Tom Hendricks]

I would not do it via SMS, you have her phone number give her a call. You don't have to rush into asking her out. Talking about nothing, finding shared interest is a good way to start. Then you can proceed to ask her out. The one thing you have to remember, the worst thing she can do is say no. However even if she does say no now, doesn't mean it will be a no forever. The fear of asking someone out is irrational, just in your head. You must have confidence in yourself, if you don't who will?

 

[Gov Kodos]

Sure, if you do nothing it is really letting your fears get in the way of you having a happy life. If this does go sour, I will disavow all knowledge of this conversation.

 

[Sean Aaron]

Keep it non-threatening - ask her if she'd like to go out for a coffee - low-key and gives you a chance to chat and see if there's anything there.

 

[Stardate]

thanks guys i appreciate your replies.

 

[Jetfire]

Be honest.
Be yourself.
And don't sweat it...be in the moment.

 

[Robert Maxwell]

Keep it non-threatening - ask her if she'd like to go out for a coffee - low-key and gives you a chance to chat and see if there's anything there.

Yup, this is what I would do. Just something simple and from which you could both easily escape if it's not working out.

And last time I met a girl for "coffee," we wound up spending the whole day and evening together, so you never know how it'll work out.

 

[Mr Awe]

In this day and age, yes, it would be totally acceptable to ask her out this way. Agree with the others that it should be low key, coffee date type of thing. If that goes well, ask on a proper date right there in person during the coffee date.

Mr Awe

 

[Sean Aaron]

The best part is, it's just "have a chat" with someone you already have some familiarity with - no need to feel awkward about being direct like if you were chatting someone up on the street just because they had nice legs or something.

 

[Stardate]

I am not a coffee man but i was thinking a light dinner then a movie theater followed by walking her home. She lives with her father who is also fugitive. I have meet him twice at my brother house. Nice man however speaks little English. Anyway asking her out via sms is perhaps not bright but i am thinking to break the ice i could sent her sms Wishing her happy first Summerday(yesterday in my country) and happy holiday. Pehaps ask her about computer info being helpful. What do you think.

 

[Sean Aaron]

I really wouldn't do dinner and a movie as a first date. Lots of pressure to have a good time and the cinema is totally non-interactive - it defeats the purpose of the date: getting to know her.

If you don't like coffee, how about lunch with no further activity planned?

 

[Stardate]

Lunch sounds better then coffee, thanks

 

[Sean Aaron]

Good luck!

 

[Stardate]

Good luck!

Thanks, if it all works out i will will naming my first born Sean(if that is your real name).

 

[Sean Aaron]

It's my real first and last name; given the city location I expect you could find my current address easily enough.

I do not fear the internet!

 

[Finn]

Yeah. No movie. You are supposed to talk with her...

 

[Gaith]

What everyone else has said; also, you might like to consult my Guide written on this very subject...

 

[LaxScrutiny]

Don't ask her out via text, but it's usually a good idea to text a brief message saying "Hi it's <insert name here> is this a good time to call?" That way you don't call when she's busy or with someone or her mum's in the room etc and you end up feeling insecure and brushed off.

Generally speaking, don't ask a woman out. Make assertive (not aggressive) statements like "I'm usually down in your area in the afternoons, we should meet for coffee" and later "There's a really cool show I'm going to next week, you should come!" Don't be overly pushy but just show the confidence that you feel you are worth spending time with, and that you are open to her sharing your time.

Don't be too specific about dates and times. If she turns you down, she has to be assertive about turning down the entire concept, saying she's busy for the next month etc so this doesn't leave you wondering if she was interested or not. Be clear about the concept and that you are open to her joining you. If she isn't interested, just forget it and move on.