"
Stand Up and Get Knocked Down"
Drugs are bad.
god save me from TJ's comedy at that.
"
Meet Mr. Mxyzptlk"
And I thought Smallville were punks for turning this 5th dimensional Sprite into a Russian bookie with a just enough telekinesis to fix football games. That little hat, god save me from that little hat.
But frankly this episode is a 70s comic book. Also, I just started noticing that Carey Bates is a consultant on this project.
"
Birdwoman of the Swamps"
It's called peyote. Maybe they were trying for spooky but it just seemed racist.
"
War of the Species"
Stupid robot. Seriously, why call the droid a robot when it's just some fat guy in a body sock. Hells bells, half the actors face was exposed. Are we supposed to believe that that was artificial flesh or that he'd been using sheets of human flesh as spare parts?
Someone in wardrobe needs to be spanked.
TJ screwing up and missing his shot of the big fight(s) over and over was almost funny, but the twist at the end where the mad scientist roboticist turns out to be an alien robot himself preparing for a battle beyond the stars... I'm surprised to use a word like "inspired" but then there's an antiwar PSA and it all wraps up into a classy bow.
Barely a last minute save.
"
Little Hercules"
So there's this ten year old who dreams about murdering his classmates, wakes up, takes over a nuclear submarine and then starts making out with a 16 year old
woman until she consensually commits to a relationship?
AND HE'S THE GOOD GUY!!!!!
The Submarine reading poetry was a gang busters.
"
Mutant"
24th century mutants come back to get plutonium to nuke their neighbours.
Words fail me.
"
The Phantom of the Third Division"
Another story about a war veteran who thinks it's all still go.
Stalking Pa Kent, who left this guy behind in North Korea.
Pa Kent had some theatrical moments but, but really could you find a more hackney plot to repeat?
"
Black Flamingo"
Oh my god.
A good episode.
Who knew?
No spoilers.
"
Hollywood"
Okay, what the frakks happening?
This episode was little short of spectacular.
Gave me a nerdgasm.
Two in a row that are not gut wrenchingly puke inducing.
Wow.
Speaking of wow.
A young, 20-something Gail O'Grady.
Mmmmm.
And a young 70 something Doug McClure.
Time travel to 1930s Hollywood.
It ticks all the boxes, and the weird thing was that they gave John newton a string of lines to say all at the same time as he bantered with Doug McClure. Seriously the scripts up to this point have no confidence in this guy, and I'm almost inclined to think it's warranted so.
"
Succubus"
Okay so maybe Carey Bates isn't a genius. An immotal woman eating the youth out of her lovers but she bites off more than she can chew and turns into calcified sperm.
The actress was barely pretty enough to be called a cougar but her speech near the end about how she'd dominated men for the last thousand years and how history had got on its hands and knees to kiss her feet was a little impressive.
It felt big.
"
Luthor Unleashed"
Last chance to shine.
Superboy saved Luthors life froma lab explosion, and Lana was nice to him and he fell in love with Lana and they were going to live happily ever after and... And, and, and..
Then his hair falls out and shit gets real.
He blames Superboy for his hair and backhands Lana in the jaw like he was Hank Pym or Mel Gibson.
Extra points for the Ninja.
More extra points for lines like "Lex be careful, your death ray is killing our ninja!"
It was the final episode.
The writers went mental.
Season one is over.
I'm sleepy.