TOS Caption Contest #128 - Record Time

McCOY:"Odd. Spock just shape-shifted into a Hostess Ho-Ho."

 

McCOY:"We're gonna need Betty Ford on the line when we get up there, Christine!!"




"HA HA HA!!!!

Your jokes about haggis and afterbirth are priceless, Monty!"



SULU:"Act natural.

I tried this once during Straight Pride Week at the Academy."

 

Scotty was always mystified at how easily women laugh at mundane relationship humor set in an engine room.

 

McCoy regretted not upgrading to a communicator with a 5MP camera.

 

MCCOY: More bars my ass!!!!

 

Scotty: "Ye thinks that's bad, lass, wait for the backend ..."





Scotty forever regretted introducing a video camera into their bedroom antics.

 

Romaine: "Oh that cracks me up. I can't believe that you eat nipples and twatties!"

Scott: "They're neeps and tatties ye ignorant wench. Just for that I won't be givin' ye ma Orkney Clapshot."

 

Romaine: "Oh, that Kramer cracks me the hell up!"
Scotty: "Och. Seinfeld sucks worse than ye do, ye all-teeth git."
<Romaine stops laughing.>
Scotty: "Ye shouldna go at it like yer eatin' an ear o'corn, luv. There, it had t'be said!"
<Romaine storms off.>
Scotty, continuing his work: "Feh."

 

Re: Caption Contest #128 - Record Time



The Honarable Reverend Doctor McCoy: Soul brother #1 reporting in, you gots to beam me and the homies up, Huggybear just called and he needs his threads back....ya dig?

 

Re: Caption Contest #128 - Record Time

Ah, a new convert to the Carl Spock sensation.

 

Re: Caption Contest #128 - Record Time



The Honorable Reverend Doctor McCoy: "He pimp-slapped the wrong 'ho."





Scotty: "Oh, I've walked in on the Captain in full drag many-a-time, lass."

 

Romaine: "While you're screwing around with the remote, try switching on the subtitles. I want to know what the hell Borgus Frat means."

 

WORST AMERICAN IDOL AUDITION TAPE EVER.

 

"McCoy to Enterprise!

Guess what just happened down here...NO...GUESS!!!"




Subspace inversion humor. Subjective.



SULU:"Quick...kiss and then blow me. I've gotta get a new rep fast."

 

Takai: Seriously Nichelle! I've been dreaming of the perfect ceremony for years! But what if I invited Shatner to the wedding and he REFUSES to come? I'd be SO embarrassed! Publicly humiliated!

Nichols: Oh George. Poor, sweet George. The stupid shit you worry about . . .

 

GEORGE:"Gene did what to you?

That's it. I'm off women for LIFE."

 

Kirk: All I said is, "The Power of Christ Compels You". Next thing I know . . . pea green soup!

McCoy: Dammit, Jim! I'm a Doctor, not an Exorcist. McCoy to Enterprise. We need a catholic Priest and some holy water beamed down immediately.

Spock (mumbling): In the middle of the earth .. . in the land of . . . Shire . . . Lives a brave . . . little hobbit whom . . . we all admire . . . Bilbo . . . bil . . . bo . . .

 

KIRK:"I kept telling Spock he couldn't hold his Nyquil!"

 

The Honorable Reverend Doctor McCoy: "Apparently bitches can choke back."

 

Scotty: "When a man sharts 'imself, the last thing 'e needs is giggles from t'missus."