I Was Strangled and Beaten by a Stranger. I'm Injured. I'm Angry.

Actually, I would do it all again because had I not interfered, the attacker either would have killed the victim, or no one would have gotten involved, enforcing the status quo until the victim was eventually murdered by his partner. As angry as I am at the victim right now, had I decided this was not my business and abandoned him there on the floor, I could not live with myself ever again. But because I did do something, my conscience is clean.

It's the only part of me that doesn't hurt right now.

I can't say that for anyone else involved in this. While I was at my apartment building on Tuesday, my neighbors scurried past me with their heads down and wouldn't look me in the eye. I think they know what they failed to do, and they're going to have to live with themselves over this for the rest of their lives.

Me? I can live with myself.

 

I'm very sad to hear of your experience Bears, and the situation you are now in. It's hard to think of helpful things to say in times like this, other than that we're thinking of you, and hope that the outcome to this ordeal will be as painless as possible for you.

I will say that I think it's important to remember that in going to help somebody in need, not knowing the situation you'd face, that you were motivated by an instinct of kindness, and selflessness.

I think it's important to remember that such altruism is a precious and lovable part of who you are.

Allow yourself to acknowledge this, and try to draw strength from this knowledge. You need this strength at the moment, because you don't want to allow this ordeal to shatter your self-confidence, nor do we want your anger to consume the wonderful person you are.

I wish you a swift recovery.

 

That is absolutely terrible (and I work for a court, although I'n NOT a lawyer) but I'm shocked by two things:

1) You were violently attacked and assaulted by that same man. Why are the police not asking and/or allowing you to press charges against him for his assault on you? That just seems like major (and actionable in a Civil court in that the Police are NOT doing their job protecting you after a viscious assualt).

2) That after getting your statement a police officer didn't ask you to read it over and sign it before he attached it to the report. Again, it seems like proper investigating procedures were ignored and you again definitely have a Civil case for damages.

All in all, I do hope you recover quickly; can get your life back on track, and get over this horrible ordeal.

 

Some of us are old enough that the name "Kitty Genovese" still means something. I was so horrified by your Post that I forgot to even mention how incredibly brave you were. You should indeed be very proud of yourself.

 

You have a lot of courage, Bears. My hat's off to you.

J.

 

bears you can write direct to the california victims program..

http://www.boc.ca.gov/victims/howtoapply.aspx

pm the city you live in and i would be willing to research local options.

glad you got an attorney but i agree with elk and others that maybe you might be better served by contacting the da's office.
the police just investigate but the da will prosecute.

i still think you saved the silly asses life even though he isnt grateful and seems to need a whole lot of both emotional and physical medical help.

 

Wow, Bears. Sorry to hear about this incident. Sounds like a traumatizing thing and I'm really greatful that you came out of it with your life.

The attorney you're talking to is he pro-bono? That would I think be the best route for you to go but it seems like you've a great, and massive, case against many levels of people in this incident.

And if you're having difficulty with your apartment manager and others I would certainly get a consumer watch-dog group from a local paper or news station involved.

I hope all gets better for you and best wishes. You have my prayers.

 

Yay Bears! Better to Fight for Civilization than Curl up and die.

 

That is what you get for trying to be a hero...

I mean, the people paid to help us...fall short alot of the times, when we take matters in our own hands...we get burned. I think you did a terrific thing and you are a wonderful person for that...sad reality is our world sucks. Don't let it get you down, just keep fighting for what you need to get past this and hope you get better, the person you helped also.




JF

 

Thanks Trekker. I actually don't have an attorney yet because I don't have the first clue how to go about getting one. I've never needed the services of a lawyer before.

Does anyone have advice on how to find and choose a lawyer? Will I need more than one lawyer? One for the apartment complex and one for the attacker? I'm lost in the woods, and it's only compounding my frustration.

This happened in Los Angeles, CA btw. If that's helpful.

The police asked me if I wanted to press charges and I was like, omg do you even have to ask that question?! Of course! I want to press every charge against him I can. Hell, I even want to nail him for sexual assault because he ripped my shirt open and left me exposed!

The police said I can do nothing until the DA contacts me. At this point there's not even a detective on the case. I have no idea how to contact the DA on my own.

I'm sorry if these dilemmas have absurdly simple solutions that I'm just not seeing. My brain is still so scrambled from trauma, pain and meds that I'm barely functioning at this point, and I can scarcely figure out how to put my bra on, let alone track down the Man. Again, victim's services is supposed to help me take care of all of this, and they won't return my calls.

 

The thing with "the people we pay to help us" aren't being paid to help us. They're being paid to clean up the mess.

Bears did what she was "supposed to do" and acted, stepped in to help a neighbor -a fellow human being. If she called "the people we pay to help us" they wouldn't have gotten there in time to help the "victim." We have to protect our selves. Unfortuantly the people we pay to clean up the mess left behind by those who don't live in our society don't always do everything the can or everything they're supposed to do correctly.

Bears probably did everything she was supposed to and it's unfortuante that she has to pay dearly for her chivalry and no one is coperating with her to get her what she needs. It's for this reason that few people step in to help those in need.

 

Jesus Christ. I just echo what everyone else says, you're a total rock star and I hope you kick some serious ass.

 

I didn't say she was the bad guy/girl, I have been on the wrong end of situations...we do need to protect ourselves...but sometimes in this world...that really isn't enough.

JF

 

I don't live in CA, bears, but I found this:

http://www.hjpmlaw.com/PracticeAreas/Assault-Battery.asp

http://www.cal-injurylaw.com/PersonalInjury_Assault_and_Battery.asp

http://www.usdoj.gov/eoir/probono/freelglchtCA.htm

J.

 

You are a brave, admirable soul.

You do not have to wait for the DA to contact you. He is an elected official. A public servant.

I do not know where in LA you reside, but here is a lnik:

http://da.co.la.ca.us/locations3.htm

 

All you can do is call them and talk to them. I would reccomend not going with the ones you see advertised on local daytime TV but that's just a personal feeling.

Most should offer free consultation and one who is pro-bono only gets money if he wins, otherwise you don't pay him a cent. I feel these are the best to go with as they're only going to take cases they can win and they're going to fight to win because otherwise they don't get paid and they're out all of the costs. One lawyer is all you should need he'll have other lawyers, paralegals and such to take care of all the aspects of it.

But all you can do is open the phone-book and start calling people.

 

I am sorry that this has happened to you and I hope that you will eventually see justice done.

My son, Adam, used to help an old lady across the road. he would help her shop and would mow her lawn.

Then the old lady's son, who lives in Melbourne, visited her. One day the son was sitting in the kitchen and the old lady asked Adam not to leave or call the police if something happened. She asked Adamto make her son something to eat. Adam started to make some sandwiches and put on the jug to make a cup of tea. After the jug had boiled her son, without any provocation, punched Adam and as Adam was trying to escape the man threw the jug of water at him. Both Adam and the old woman were scalded.

Adam ran to the house next door and asked for the polcie to be called. The police came and the guy was arrested and an ambulance was called for my son. The old lady didn't tell the police that she had been scalded.

Then a couple of days later the old lady came over and talked to me and my son. She was upset because my son had called the police when she had asked him not to. She said "I can't trust you, Adam". She said her son would probably go to prison because he had outstanding warrants because he had skipped bail before. She told us that her son's partner was so upset over him being arrested she had had a miscarriage. She said though she had been scalded she didn't call the polcie because she was a good mother who wanted to protect her son.

I lost my temper with the old lady and told her to fuck off and Not to talk to my son again.

The courts released the son on bail and he skipped bail, so my son has not seen justice done.

 

Geez Bears, that's awful. I hope your physical and mental injuries heal quickly. And it's okay to be angry. It'll actually help you pursue your course of action.

Take care of yourself.

 

Good for you for chewing that woman out. I am so dammed SICK of seeing these "victims" not lift a finger to get themselves out of their situation and then sitting by while innocent people get hurt by their abusers.

Really, if you don't have enough self respect to keep someone from abusing you then move out into the countryside and away from other people. The rest of us don't deserve to become victims to your refusal to do something about your situation.

 

THANK YOU. I am scouring this website right now.

Under any other circumstances, I could have found this so easily. It's amazing how google-fu goes right out the window when you've been traumatized. How I haven't curled up into a ball at this point is amazing.