Stranger Sitting Practically Next To You At A Fast Food Restaurant

[sonak]

Looking for opinions on if this is as incredibly rude as I found it.


So I was eating at a fast-food restaurant on a lunch hour. And there's those tables you know, with the swivel chairs, and the two that are basically next to each other in a corner.


I mean, they're not literally part of the same table, but the chairs are so close together, that they'd serve the same purpose if you were sitting next to a friend or something.


So I take my tray full of cheap, mediocre food to one of those corner tables, and begin to take off my coat.


Then this random middle-aged man I don't know puts his tray down at the table right next to mine, so we were really close together.


Well I just sort of looked at him in shock. I thought it was incredibly rude, especially when there were plenty of other open tables, to just sit so close to me. He didn't make eye contact or say anything to me.


I just very deliberately shook my head, got up with my tray, and moved to another table.



Opinions? Comments? Concerns? Condemnation? Ridicule?

 

[Jadzia]

Then this random middle-aged man I don't know puts his tray down at the table right next to mine, so we were really close together.

Well I just sort of looked at him in shock. I thought it was incredibly rude, especially when there were plenty of other open tables, to just sit so close to me. He didn't make eye contact or say anything to me.

Perhaps he doesn't like dining alone? Perhaps he thought you looked lonely? Or perhaps you were in his spot?

 

[Shazam!]

You get that on buses too. Like if you're sat on an otherwise empty bus and someone will either sit right behind you or right in front of you. It's unnerving.

 

[Jadzia]

You get that on buses too. Like if you're sat on an otherwise empty bus and someone will either sit right behind you or right in front of you. It's unnerving.

It's so they can spend an otherwise boring bus ride fantasizing about you.

 

[ToddKent]

How about when it happens in the bathroom? A wall full of unused urinals and the guy has to use the one next to me. What's with that?

 

[sonak]

How about when it happens in the bathroom? A wall full of unused urinals and the guy has to use the one next to me. What's with that?

Yeah, that's even weirder.

 

[Asbo Zaprudder]

It's probably just Jarvis cruising for talent.

 

[auntiehill]

That seems to happen to me at movie theaters all the time. I often go to movies during the week, when very few people go. I'll walk into an empty theater, sit down--not smack in the middle either, as I have a bad ear and like that ear to be closer to the speakers.

A handful of people might come in--maybe three or four---and no matter how big and empty the theater is, someone will invariably sit RIGHT in front of me, or even right next to me, leaving only one or two seats between us. It's bizarre.

 

[Shazam!]

You get that on buses too. Like if you're sat on an otherwise empty bus and someone will either sit right behind you or right in front of you. It's unnerving.

It's so they can spend an otherwise boring bus ride fantasizing about you.

I am rather marvelous, aren't I.

 

[Gryffindorian]

Same goes for parking lots. If you park your car in a nearly empty lot with 5,000 open spaces, the next vehicle will park right next to your car. Guaranteed.

I think some people lack the concept of personal space and privacy.

EDIT:

I also have this theory of "herd mentality." Some people just like to flock together in groups, whether or not they know other people.

 

[Jadzia]

Same goes for parking lots. If you park your car in a nearly empty lot with 5,000 open spaces, the next vehicle will park right next to your car. Guaranteed.

That one hedges one's risks of a break in. A vehicle on it's own is vulnerable. A vehicle in a crowd is to some extent 'lost in the crowd', making it less likely to be a target of vehicle crime. There are other cars to distract the crook away from yours.

I think some people lack the concept of personal space and privacy.

There's also the concept of queuing. People are naturally inclined to do this in shops as they queue for the checkout or to wait their turn to be served, and it may have become instinctive to some degree to line things up close together in an orderly fashion.

 

[Rom's Sehlat]

This is probably a stupid question, but are you in Europe? I am in the United States but my parents lived in Germany for a few years. They said behavior like what you described is perfectly normal (well, was 20 years ago). Maybe the guy was European?

 

[scotpens]

. . . I also have this theory of “herd mentality.” Some people just like to flock together in groups, whether or not they know other people.

Well, flock ’em.

 

[C.E. Evans]

Humans are generally very social animals, for the most part.

 

[trampledamage]

Maybe he just didn't want to take up a family table when he's by himself - it's not his fault the restaurant designed those seats really badly.

 

[Ood Sigma]

Heck, I've had an even more bizarre experience. My wife and I were dining at a very nice French sit-down restaurant. The couple at a nearby table started talking to us as sometimes happens when you overhear a conversation and have something to add. But in this case, after a minute or so, they asked if we minded if they sat with us. Before we could really answer, they moved their food over to our table and proceeded to sit down. We didn't want to be rude so we ended up having the meal with them, despite the fact that we didn't even really like them. If it had been a special occasion such as a birthday or anniversary I probably would have objected.

Afterwards, the owner, who we knew pretty well, apologized to us and said that couple does that to people all the time. She had asked them not to do it because it makes other customers uncomfortable, but I guess they didn't care. The owner said she tries to seat them as far away from other people as possible, to prevent that happening, but that night they were just too busy and we were the unlucky ones.

 

[Shazam!]

The couple at a nearby table started talking to us as sometimes happens when you overhear a conversation and have something to add. But in this case, after a minute or so, they asked if we minded if they sat with us. Before we could really answer, they moved their food over to our table and proceeded to sit down

Swingers

 

[sonak]

Maybe he just didn't want to take up a family table when he's by himself - it's not his fault the restaurant designed those seats really badly.

That would be a factor IF there hadn't been plenty of open seats available. It's not an issue to take up a bigger table by oneself if there's plenty of seating.


The seats weren't really designed badly, it just seems obvious they'd be used with one family or group of friends sitting together or something, as they're so close.


Oh, and this was in the U.S. , important to keep in mind other standards may apply elsewhere as another poster pointed out.


But really, this just seemed a lack of respect for personal space more than anything else.

 

[TEACAKE'S PLEATHER DOME]

Maybe the seat he sat on was "his" seat, as in he always sat there and was a regular.

Where I live the cafes are quite small and it is normal to have strangers sitting at the actual table with you if it is full otherwise, at least I always indicate they are welcome to do so rather than leave if I'm one person sitting at a 4 seater table. LOL, I actually have friends I have made that way.

 

[Yoda]

In college I once tried to exploit the 'favorite seat' behavior. In one of those huge ass lecture halls in one of those classes that fill it to a whopping 10 percent of capacity, there was this one hot chick who would always sit in the same seat. There was absolutely nothing remarkable about this seat. It was in a perfectly random row, a few seats in. I on the other hand had always sat in the same general area, but in random seats.. because.. well, there were 9 empty seats for every one taken. One day I made sure to get there ahead of her and take the seat next to her and sure enough she flocked to her seat regardless.

I kind of wonder what would have happened if I had straight up stolen her seat.